


when you are young they assume you know nothing

by outerloops



Category: Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, M/M, POV Alternating, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-02
Updated: 2021-02-26
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:34:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 27,751
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25676695
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/outerloops/pseuds/outerloops
Summary: Anakin has a bad habit. Obi-Wan has a solution. They find a probably-cursed relic.
Relationships: Obi-Wan Kenobi/Anakin Skywalker
Comments: 60
Kudos: 214





	1. a cure for bruxism

A rhythmic, sharp noise pierced the silence of the ship. Obi-Wan's eyes snapped open, searching for the source of the sound in the darkness. For a moment, the noise abated, and he wondered if he had imagined it. Then, with renewed rigor, the high‐pitched squeaking began again.

 _A mouse?_ He thought wildly, still trying to shake off sleep. But the sound was oddly familiar, and Obi-Wan could sense no small life forms nearby. The only Force signature he was picking up belonged to Anakin, who appeared to be sleeping. He lingered for a moment against Anakin's mind. It had been a long while since he felt the young Jedi's mind without his mental shields up.

Anakin was in a seated position against the wall, arms crossed in front of his chest, but definitely asleep, head tilted back. Obi-Wan recalled the events of the previous evening, Anakin coming to his quarters to discuss their next move and his thoughts on their mission. Despite his efforts at shielding, which was never his strong suit, Obi-Wan could sense Anakin's anxiety. The hour ran late and when he asked to stay a while longer, Obi-Wan could not refuse. He recommended Anakin meditate-- also not his strong suit. Which, Obi-Wan mused, is probably how he ended up going to bed with Anakin still in his cabin, now sound asleep.

The noise began again, and suddenly Obi-Wan felt very stupid.

He sighed and wondered when Anakin had started grinding his teeth in his sleep again, or if he had ever really stopped. It had been a long time since Obi-Wan slept this close to the young Jedi. Years ago, when Anakin was still a Padawan and the two spent most of their time together, Obi-Wan had quickly found this bad habit to be particularly grating, especially when he was trying to get what little sleep he could. He also grew tired of Anakin's complaining the next day of headache and jaw pain. But for the most part he had worked to find a solution out of empathy for the young boy.

"Anakin," he whispered.

Anakin was fast asleep. Obi-Wan briefly considered nudging him awake with the Force and pretending to still be asleep. Anakin would awaken, probably realize where he'd accidentally fallen asleep, and return to his quarters. He also might not be able to fall back asleep, and Obi-Wan knew how much they both needed a good night's rest. As if on cue, Anakin began grinding his teeth with renewed vigor again.

Sighing, Obi-Wan slid out of bed and moved across the room toward Anakin. Silently, he sat down against the wall next to him, not quite touching him, and closed his eyes. Obi-Wan was surprised at how comfortably familiar it felt to reach his mind out toward Anakin, despite it being years since he'd done so in this way. Anakin was a man well into his twenties now, and a Jedi Knight in his own right, and Obi-Wan wasn't in the business of spying on his friend's mind while he was sleeping. The first time he had tried this, when Anakin was still a boy, the intrusion into his mind had startled him awake immediately. After Obi-Wan apologetically explained his motive, however, Anakin was eager for him to try again, not relishing the headaches that plagued him in the mornings. It took several nights of practice to perfect the light touch required to enter Anakin's mind without waking him, but Anakin's trust had spurred him to continue trying. Obi-Wan remembered the first night he'd gotten it right, Anakin had shaken him awake the next morning beaming down at him, so excited to tell him it had worked, as if Obi-Wan didn't already know. He still couldn't stop a fond smile from coming to his face, even now, pleased with his success.

They went on like this for some time, particularly around times of intense stress, but it had seemed to Obi-Wan that Anakin was gaining some control of it himself as his Jedi training went on. He grew older, and before long the boy that once would jump in bed with Obi-Wan to wake him in the mornings became a teenager that did not want his Master in his head any more. His shielding grew stronger and Obi-Wan was no longer invited into his mind.

He looked at the tight clench of Anakin’s jaw and made his decision.

He felt no mental resistance when he gently brushed against Anakin's mind, but he could feel the tension in his muscles as acutely as if it were his own. He had to consciously relax his own jaw and focus on letting Anakin's feelings pass through him instead of absorbing them. He pushed feelings of calmness through their bond and felt the tension slowly turn to warmth, seeping thick and syrupy into Obi-Wan's own mind. Anakin made a soft sound and unconsciously shifted closer to him.

Obi-Wan stayed like that for longer than he'd like to admit, stroking the neglected bond between them. He missed this feeling more than he had realized. Before long, the lull of sleep started to pull him in like a black hole. He reluctantly started to disentangle himself from Anakin's mind, beginning to doubt his assertion that his friend would not mind the intrusion.

Suddenly, a burst of hot pleasure filled him, spreading low in his belly. Obi-Wan almost severed their connection in alarm before he realized that the feeling had come from Anakin. Regaining control, he cracked an eye open to verify that yes, Anakin was still fast asleep, dreaming by the looks of it.

He should pull away now, Obi-Wan thought, his heart racing. He did what he intended to do, and Anakin was _clearly_ no longer suffering. And yet, Obi-Wan lingered, impossibly transfixed and desperate to feel that again.

He reached through the bond again, if only to affirm his suspicions.

This time, an image, almost like a mirage in its fluid, shimmering quality, floated back to him across their connection. He was looking at himself, undressed from the waist up, reclined back on his elbows looking up at Anakin, who was straddling his hips in a similar state of undress. Anakin appeared to say something into his ear that Obi-Wan could not hear. He watched, stunned, as his counterpart grinned up at Anakin before being pressed back against the bed by two large hands on his chest and kissed deeply. He watched with a combination of horror and intrigue as his own arms wound around Anakin's waist, pulling him down flush against himself. As he watched Anakin grind his hips down against his counterpart, he felt the spike of pleasure and lust as intensely as if it were his own.

Obi-Wan's eyes snapped open and he tore away from the sleeping Anakin, the real Anakin, sitting beside him. Obi-Wan sucked in a breath, chancing a glance at Anakin, fully expecting to find him awake and vehemently disgusted at Obi-Wan's intrusion. All he found was a slight frown on Anakin's face, his brow furrowed as if he sensed the sudden loss of Obi-Wan's presence in his mind. Despite this, he remained impossibly, peacefully asleep.

Obi-Wan scrubbed a hand over his face, feeling guilty and aroused in equal measure. He briefly considered waking Anakin, saving face and owning up to his transgression. He ultimately decided there was no point in waking Anakin now when the whole point of this was to let him sleep. The fact that the longer he slept, the less chance there was he would remember this dream did not play into his decision, Obi-Wan told himself.

He stood and returned to his bed, sitting with his conflicting emotions a moment longer before releasing them into the Force. He would meditate on this tomorrow and feel better, he told himself.

______

Obi-Wan spun his lightsaber in his hand, taking a large step forward before plunging his weapon into the chest of the last remaining battle droid. It fell to the ground with a resounding clank, echoing off the high walls and ceiling for a time until finally the large hall was silent.

“So much for being abandoned,” Anakin said next to him.

“Indeed,” Obi-Wan replied. “I sense we are alone now though. The Separatists must have left in a hurry.”

“What are we looking for again?”

“A small relic, thousands of years old. Probably heavily guarded. The Council believes it is of high significance to the Sith. Master Yoda said we’ll know it when we see it.”

“Of course he did,” Anakin rolled his eyes.

Obi-Wan glanced sideways at him. They had been woken early by communication from the Jedi Council, and set out as soon as they landed planetside. So far Anakin had made no mention of anything strange occurring last night. Obi-Wan had not had proper time to meditate on the matter, and was inclined to take it for what it was: a sex dream that he had inadvertently influenced by his presence in Anakin’s mind at the time. It meant nothing. If anyone should be embarrassed about it, it should be Obi-Wan for his intrusion. No sense dragging Anakin into the awkwardness, he reasoned.

They proceeded through the main hall into a smaller room that split off in three directions. Obi-Wan reached out with Force, trying to sense the correct path.

“It’s this way,” Anakin said, already heading down the west hall. “Come on, this place is giving me the creeps.”

Obi-Wan agreed the whole planet was giving off a bad feeling, and it was becoming more concentrated the further they explored this building. He felt like something was watching them, but could not place it coming from any one direction. The darkness seemed to surround them, the only pale blue light coming from their lightsabers.

They continued down the hallway for what seemed like a very long time. The building had not appeared this large from the outside, and Obi-Wan began to realize they were going underground. The hallway seemed to become narrower as they went, the walls closing in ever so slightly. Anakin was uncharacteristically quiet, Obi-Wan glancing at him to see that his jaw was tightly clenched.

“Anakin, you’re going to give yourself a headache,” Obi-Wan admonished, as he had done hundreds of times before when Anakin was a boy.

Anakin gave him a strange look, opening his mouth to reply when suddenly the unending darkness gave way and they reached the end of the hall.

A dusty mirror reflected their appearances back at them, illuminated in the pale blue light. Below that, a small wooden table stood, upon which sat an empty bowl.

“This is a dead end. We must have chosen the wrong path—” Obi-Wan began before Anakin held up a hand to quiet him.

He stared into the mirror with an intent look on his face. His normally handsome features seemed distorted and grotesque in the dim light, shadows marring his skin making him appear older. Obi-Wan’s senses heightened, listening for something, anything, to explain Anakin’s behavior. Even the Force was quiet, and it was making him more anxious by the minute. Finally, he could take it no longer.

“Anakin, what—”

A loud wail ripped through the narrow hallway, buckling Obi-Wan’s knees. His hands flew up to cover his ears, eyes shooting up, expecting to find the terrible scream coming from Anakin. He looked up just in time to see Anakin snatch a small spherical object from the previously empty bowl on the table. He turned immediately and hauled Obi-Wan back to his feet.

“We have to go, NOW!” Anakin hollered over the deafening scream that seemed to be coming from all around them, from the walls themselves, or perhaps from inside their own heads.

They started running full tilt toward the main hall. The angle of the floor seemed to become unnaturally steeper as they went, as though whatever was controlling this place was trying to keep them inside. The walls were definitely closing in on them now, sucking the air out of the hallway as they ran. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, they reached the previous room, just barely squeezing through the entryway of what had previously been big enough for the two of them to walk side by side.

The assault did not cease. If anything, it seemed the building became even more desperate to stop them from leaving, tearing itself apart in the process. Obi-Wan’s eyes were drawn to the east hall as they passed, where eight sets of yellow eyes blinked out at them from the darkness. A foul smell seemed to emanate from within.

He felt the Force nudge him for the first time since they entered this place. He looked up just in time to see a large piece of the ceiling crumble, hurtling toward him and Anakin. He threw up his hands, slowing its descent and guiding it to fall behind them.

They ran through the main hall toward the exit, dodging falling debris as they went. Anakin put out his hand, blasting the large doors open as they approached. Obi-Wan felt as though he was being squeezed through a vacuum until the moment they crossed the threshold back out into the planet's dry climate.

The deafening roar stopped, the gravitational pull of the building stopped, and suddenly it was impossibly still and quiet again. A glance behind them revealed the ancient building, standing exactly as intact as it had when they first arrived. Obi-Wan wrapped the Force around himself in relief. Beside him, Anakin was doubled over panting, still clutching the relic in his hand.

“I’ve never been so happy to see sand,” he bit out, shooting a glance at Obi-Wan.

“Neither have I,” he agreed wryly.

“What was that place?” Anakin asked, straightening up.

“Seems like I should be asking you,” Obi-Wan responded, Anakin sending him a quizzical look. “You were able to retrieve the artifact.”

Anakin shook his head.

“I don’t understand it any better than you. It felt like the whole place was… talking to me. Telling me what to do. At first, I thought it was the Force, and maybe it was but it felt… different.”

“More sinister?” Obi-Wan suggested.

“Different,” Anakin repeated, shrugging. “You didn’t hear it?”

Obi-Wan shook his head.

“What does that mean? Was the Dark side of the Force talking to me?” Anakin asked, chewing his lip as he looked down at the relic in his gloved hand.

“The civilization of this planet is long extinct,” Obi-Wan began. “Many of its people were Force users, but the concept of the Light and the Dark were foreign to them. They thought of the Force as a unifying whole. What we perceive as a Sith artifact now would have been considered only a powerful Force object to the people of this civilization. If this place spoke only to you, we cannot assume it was because of the Dark. I don’t know why this place used you as its conduit. Perhaps it sensed you were more receptive in the Force and chose to communicate through you.”

“Regardless, I’m glad to be away from it.”

“Yes, let’s get back to the ship and notify the Council.” Obi-Wan replied, not interested in staying any longer, despite the questions he still had.


	2. coffee for your head

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I went back and edited the first chapter a little bit, but no major changes were made. Thank you for the kudos and kind words :)

Anakin was walking through the darkened halls of the Jedi Temple looking for Obi-Wan. He had forgotten to tell him something important about their most recent mission. He couldn't sense him in the Force, which wasn't unusual on its own since his master often had his shields up, especially if he was talking to the other Council members. He passed a few people in the halls, but no one looked his way. He found himself in front of Obi-Wan's quarters and knocked briefly. After no response, he tried the doorknob and found it unlocked. He hesitantly pushed inside and found himself in front of the Jedi Council, seated in a semi-circle looking expectantly at Anakin. The door closed behind him. He whirled around, confused, unsure of how he got here. He opened his mouth to speak when he noticed Obi-Wan sitting in his usual seat, stroking his beard and staring off absently. Mace cleared his throat, drawing Anakin's attention.

"I think you know why we're here, Skywalker."

Anakin opened his mouth to say _no, actually, I have no idea what I've done this time,_ but found himself unable to speak. His hands came up to his throat instinctively, his eyes searching for Obi-Wan’s, who was still looking anywhere but at him.

"You are being tried for treason, for your crimes against the Republic."

Anakin's heart rate picked up. The force keeping him from speaking was now starting to constrict his airway. He looked desperately around the room, but nobody seemed to notice. Even Yoda seemed to be looking right through him, his expression bland.

"You have been conspiring against the Council to destroy the Jedi. You have betrayed your own Master."

Anakin struggled with all his might against the invisible hold on him. He tried to scream to no avail. All his mental shields fell away as he tried to reach out to Obi-Wan through their bond, begging him, _look at me, help me!_

This seemed to draw Obi-Wan's attention, and his gaze finally turned to Anakin.

"How long have you been using the Dark side of the Force?" Mace continued, voice thundering.

_Obi-Wan, tell him I'm not a traitor! Tell him it's all lies!_

To his horror, Obi-Wan's face split into a grin, stretching his handsome features grotesquely. He raised a hand out toward Anakin, clenching his fingers, and the pressure around his throat increased until he could barely breathe. He felt himself be lifted off the ground, struggling uselessly. Obi-Wan was digging through Anakin's memories now that his mind was unshielded, projecting them back at him. He seized hold of everything Anakin struggled to control, his anger, his ambition, his possessiveness—everything that the Jedi scorned. Finally, he dug deep into Anakin's desire. First, it was images of Padme, their forbidden marriage the worst kept secret in the galaxy. But then, as if sensing his relief, the images quickly morphed into sparring sessions with his master, bringing to the front all of the feelings toward Obi-Wan Anakin had been hiding from him for years. He held up memory after memory of Anakin with his hand down his pants, frustrated and desperate, eyes screwed shut imagining it was Obi-Wan touching him instead.

 _Please stop,_ Anakin begged, gasping for air.

An image of Anakin on his back, _definitely_ misusing the Force as he shaped it into a hand. He watched, mortified, as he plunged two fingers inside himself, over and over again, cock leaking all over his belly, untouched.

He was dying, his vision going black. Mace's voice was still echoing all around him, Obi-Wan was laughing now as he dug through Anakin's mind, and the cacophony of noise reached a fever pitch. He summoned all his strength and with a last ditch effort pushed out as hard as he could with the Force.

Someone screamed. He opened his eyes and flinched back when he saw Obi-Wan leaning over him, hands on his shoulders. Obi-Wan's brows were drawn tight together, eyes wide. Anakin's throat was raw, and he was gasping air like he'd been held underwater.

"It was a dream, Anakin, breathe," Obi-Wan said, squeezing his arms.

Anakin looked around, forcing his breathing to slow down. He was on the ship. They were in hyperspace, probably several hours away from Coruscant still.

He exhaled, falling back against the bed again. Obi-Wan straightened up but kept his gaze fixed intently on Anakin.

"That was… not a normal nightmare," Anakin said, finally.

"I'll say," Obi-Wan agreed. "I thought you were going to tear the ship apart."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you woke me up," Obi-Wan began hesitantly, "I heard you scream. Everything started shaking and I ran to you. Your emotions were incredibly strong and I could feel your fear..."

**_He's in your head._ **

Anakin jolted, whirling around to look for the source of the voice.

"Anakin, what—"

"You didn't hear that?"

"Hear what?" Obi-Wan replied, concern clearly evident now in his voice.

The voice startled Anakin both in its amplitude and proximity. It sounded like someone was speaking right in his ear, but it was just Obi-Wan and him on the ship.

“I feel like I’m losing my kriffing mi—” 

A strong blast shook the ship, sending them careening out of hyperspace. They were tossed sideways as another blast occurred, both of them holding on for dear life. Alarms were ringing out from the cockpit as Anakin jumped to his feet, struggling down the narrow hall with Obi-Wan close behind. He grabbed the controls, manually overriding the failing system. Another blast and a plume of smoke, and one of their engines was toast.

“There’s nothing showing up on radar. How are we under attack?” Obi-Wan called over the noise.

“We aren’t. All of the ship’s systems are just failing,” Anakin replied, rapidly dismissing critical error warnings. “It’s like something has corrupted the ship’s computer.”

Out of hyperdrive, the ship was in free fall, the remaining engines not supplying enough power to resist the gravitational pull of the nearest planet. The planet was strikingly blue with swirls of white, and a belt of asteroids, debris, and tiny moons orbiting around it. As they broke through the atmosphere, the ship started to nosedive.

"Obi-Wan, you better strap in," Anakin gritted out, both hands yanking up on the control stick.

The ship was violently shaking, threatening to come apart. Obi-Wan reached between Anakin's trembling arms to fasten his seatbelt before sitting and doing his own. Anakin felt him reach out with the Force and grab the ship's hull, trying to hold it together as they hurtled toward the planet's surface. Anakin scanned desperately for any place he could conceivably put the ship down without killing them both. As they came closer, the blueness of the planet turned out to be from the vast oceans covering much of its surface.

“Looks like we’re going for a swim,” Anakin shouted, locking the control stick in position and joining Obi-Wan’s effort.

“I have been thinking lately that I need a vacation,” Obi-Wan quipped.

Everything happened very quickly after that. The ship made impact hard, but not as hard as he knew a ground landing would have been. The last thing he remembered was reaching out toward Obi-Wan’s mind, their old connection open as both of them concentrated their full energy on holding the ship together through the crash landing. If he was going to die, he wanted to be here, in the familiar embrace of his friend’s mind, calm even in the face of uncertain survival. It felt like releasing a breath he didn’t know he was holding. Then, everything went black.

______

He hadn’t always liked Obi-Wan. He was sure Obi-Wan hadn’t liked him for a while either. When he first became Obi-Wan’s padawan, he found him overly critical and often inflexible in his teaching methods. But he was also young, too young, bouncing from being a student himself to suddenly being expected to be the teacher and protector of a young child. Of course, this didn’t register to Anakin when he was a child. He just found Obi-Wan to be an asshole most of the time.

He missed Qui-Gon. In the short time that he had known the man, he had expressed genuine interest and belief in Anakin. Early on, Anakin resented Obi-Wan, who gave off the distinct impression that he was only training Anakin because it was Qui-Gon’s dying wish. Anakin recognized now that Obi-Wan had been dealing with his own grief over losing his master, and probably not very well, given the Jedi dogma of _no emotions, no attachments_ he espoused.

He remembered the first time he felt that maybe their relationship wasn't entirely doomed from the start, over ten years ago:

He was exhausted. Obi-Wan had put him through his paces in his training that day, and his body was ready to drop. He was thinking only of his bed that evening when he sensed it: pain and grief, rolling in waves. Below that, insecurity and fear. Anakin had followed it to its source and found Obi-Wan crying quietly, hugging his knees to chest, appearing as small as Anakin in that moment. He hadn't noticed his approach and Anakin was frozen in place, part of him wanting to run away. He hadn't known Obi-Wan for very long but he knew he wasn't supposed to see this. As he lingered in the doorway, listening to Obi-Wan's sniffles, he felt confused and a little angry. He was sure if it was him crying on the floor, Obi-Wan would give him a stern look and lecture him on the Jedi way. He would tell him he needed to learn to control his emotions. His hands balled into fists at his sides at the thought.

He pushed the thought down and moved to turn away when the floor creaked under his foot, drawing Obi-Wan's attention. He cursed in Huttese (learned from Watto) startling a short laugh out of Obi-Wan despite his red-rimmed eyes.

"What are you doing here, Padawan?" he asked, rubbing at his eyes with his sleeve. "You should be asleep."

Obi-Wan somehow looked more tired than he felt.

"I…" he paused. He wasn't sure how to word it. "I think I read your mind?"

Obi-Wan seemed alarmed for a moment before Anakin continued.

"I could feel that someone was really sad, maybe even hurt. I followed it here," he said. "I'm sorry. The last time I felt something like that it was my mother."

Obi-Wan's shoulders relaxed and he looked away with an almost guilty expression.

"You and your mother must've had a strong bond," he said.

Anakin nodded. He missed his mother dearly.

"Some Force-sensitive people can form very strong bonds, strong enough to send thoughts and even feelings over long distances," Obi-Wan explained. "It's not always under our control. I will teach you how to build walls in your mind to shield your thoughts and emotions from others. Forgive me for letting mine slip, I forget how strong you are in the Force."

Anakin shifted uncomfortably. He thought that was supposed to be a compliment but it made him feel like he had done something wrong.

"I'm sorry, Master," he said again.

"Don't be," Obi-Wan shrugged. "Qui-Gon would be thrilled."

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"He always said I was too uptight," he replied, smiling fondly despite himself. "He felt that I followed the Jedi code a little too closely. We never quite saw eye to eye on that."

"But he was your master," Anakin said, surprised.

"And I am yours--do you see things exactly as I do?"

Anakin shook his head a little too quickly, making Obi-Wan laugh again.

"Qui-Gon was a good master. We were maybe not the best fit for each other but we made it work. He felt that being flexible and learning how to react on the fly were the most important. He never understood my need to learn and follow specific procedures," he paused, smiling sadly. "You two would've been perfect for each other."

Anakin flushed, pleased, but he also felt the conflicting urge to defend Obi-Wan.

"You're a good master," he mumbled, looking at his shoes.

"What do I know of being someone's master?" Obi-Wan sighed. "I've barely been on my own. The Council just respects Qui-Gon so much they allowed it. You know they offered him a seat on the Council? He turned it down. Can you imagine?"

Anakin could imagine. After being chained to one place for so long he would do anything to travel as he pleased, wherever he wanted.

"You probably think I'm a hypocrite," Obi-Wan said, wincing. "Sitting here crying about something I cannot change."

Anakin sat down on the floor next to him. For the first time, he could see exactly how hard Obi-Wan was trying to get everything right, to be absolutely perfect. As if he could prevent bad things from happening by simply never making a mistake. It sounded exhausting, and he felt a pang of empathy for him.

"You're just a person, Master," he said simply, tucking his legs under himself. "Would you like to meditate together?"

Obi-Wan blinked, staring at Anakin in surprise, before his lips twitched into a small smile.

"Yes, I'd like that, Padawan," he replied, back straightening and eyes slipping closed.

Anakin could still feel him next to him, even in the stillness, as serenity slowly replaced the guilt and pain radiating off his master. Anakin could feel him even as he tasted salt water and felt a warm breeze on his face.

He opened his eyes and the ship was in ruins.


	3. circulation, airway, breathing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again for all the nice words and kudos! I’ve never written something of this length before and your comments are major motivation to keep going. I hope you keep enjoying the story!

Obi-Wan awakened first, the throbbing in his head made worse by the bright sunlight blinding his vision. He felt disoriented and nauseous, laying face down on some hard surface. He tried to push himself up to a sitting position and grunted as a stabbing pain radiated from his left shoulder down his arm. He rolled himself over instead, holding his arm tight to his body with his right hand as he sat up. His head spun and he closed his eyes against the wave of nausea that followed. The distant sound of waves crashing against the shore helped to ground him and once the vertigo subsided enough, he opened his eyes, not comprehending what he saw.

He was sitting on the floor of the cockpit, facing what should have been the rest of the ship. Instead, he was looking out at a dense expanse of trees, green and vibrant.

The ship was completely severed in half.

The events leading up to the crash came flooding back and his heart rate accelerated. His stomach filled with cold dread as he realized he didn't know where Anakin was. His mind wasn't clear enough to reach out with the Force so he struggled to his feet, stumbling out of the wrecked ship. Looking behind him, he could see that the ship had crashed through the trees, carving a path through the forest to the ground below. He stood in a patch of sunlight cutting through the treetops, but the forest was otherwise darkened by the dense foliage. The rest of the ship was not in sight.

His arm felt broken or at least dislocated, he didn't have time to figure out which, but his legs were still able to carry him forward. There was a persistent ringing in his ears and he suspected he had a concussion. He slowly began to make his way toward the sound of ocean waves he could distantly make out, hoping it wasn't just his addled brain misinterpreting auditory signals. He remembered seeing water before they made impact; in fact, it was a miracle they had crashed into land at all given the large expanse of water occupying the planet. He eventually broke through the tree line and found himself on a stretch of white, sandy beach, dotted with patches of seaweed. About twenty meters away lay the rest of the ship and Anakin, face down in the shallow surf.

The back of the ship housed the fuel tank, which had caught on fire during the crash, but was almost completely fizzled out now in the wreckage, doused by the ocean waves. Obi-Wan hurried to Anakin's side, dropping to his knees to roll him onto his back as the surf reached toward them again. His skin was sickeningly gray, sand coating his face and hair.

Obi-Wan called his name, shaking him roughly with his good arm. After several agonizing seconds with no response, Obi-Wan shuffled into position at Anakin's side. Maneuvering his injured arm into place over Anakin's sternum, he laced the fingers of his uninjured hand over top his other hand and locked his elbows. He took a deep breath in and out, and steeled himself for what was about to happen.

On the first downward thrust, he cried out through gritted teeth, searing pain overwhelming his senses immediately. Allowing complete chest recoil, he repeated the action again quickly, and on the third thrust he felt his injured shoulder pop back into joint. After what seemed like a lifetime but was probably only a matter of seconds, Anakin spluttered out a mouthful of seawater, gasping for air. The color returned to his face and he promptly turned over on his side and vomited in the sand.

Obi-Wan slumped back with a hiss, grabbing at his injured shoulder. He had more mobility in the joint now but the pain was persistent as the adrenaline wore off. He took a few measured breaths, focusing on the slow in and out pull of air through his nose. Anakin was alive; that was what mattered. The ship was irreparable but that was not a death sentence in and of itself. There were still too many variables to jump to conclusions yet. He needed to remain calm if they were going to figure this out.

As he grounded himself, Anakin's breathing gradually evened out beside him. He pushed himself to a sitting position with a groan, holding his head in one of his hands. With his color back to normal now, Obi-Wan could see he had the beginnings of a black eye, the bruise stretching into his hairline.

"Are you alright?"

"Never better," Anakin replied, wincing as he pulled his hand away from his head and saw blood.

"Where do you suppose we are?" Obi-Wan asked, looking around.

"Probably somewhere in the Outer Rim still," he said, tapping at his wrist. "My comlink's totally busted."

"I'm sure we're quite out of range, regardless," Obi-Wan sighed. "I still don't understand what caused the ship to malfunction like that."

"Neither do I, but we need to keep our guard up in case there was some foreign interference."

"Indeed. I wonder if the ship's communicator is still functional."

"You mean the parts that aren't currently on fire?" Anakin asked, drawing a flat look from Obi-Wan.

"We have to try," he replied, grimacing as he got to his feet. "Can you stand?"

"Yeah, yeah," Anakin murmured, following suit. "Hey, is your shoulder okay?"

"Never better," Obi-Wan mimicked, starting toward the ship.

"Come on, Obi-Wan, let me check out the ship. You should rest," he called after him.

"We need to get off this planet and I'm _fine_ ," Obi-Wan responded, waving him off. "The Council said retrieving this artifact was of the utmost importance. We have to get it back to Coruscant."

"I don't think the Council predicted this," Anakin grumbled. "For all we know that artifact could've been the reason we crashed in the first place. Yoda certainly wouldn't have warned us beforehand."

"You need to have more faith in the Order, Anakin," Obi-Wan said, repeating his usual script without much conviction as they ducked under loose cables dangling from the ship’s ceiling.

"I'm just saying," Anakin continued, dodging sparks shooting off the frayed wiring. "Before the ship started to fail, something really weird happened. I can't remember it clearly anymore, it's all foggy, but I know I heard someone talking to me when I woke up from that dream. A really creepy voice, right next to me."

"You are concussed, I'm surprised you remember anything," Obi-Wan said, tapping at the ship's communicator futilely. "It was just you and me aboard the ship, nobody else."

“Yeah, you, me, and the artifact!” Anakin said, exasperated.

“Surely you’re not insinuating the artifact is haunted?” Obi-Wan teased, sending an amused glance at Anakin.

“Laugh all you want but that thing spoke to me before,” Anakin said, shaking his head. “It’s the reason I was able to take it from that place. Who’s to say it couldn’t do it again?”

“This is useless,” Obi-Wan murmured, finally giving up trying to get the communicator functioning. “Let’s at least get the artifact out of here. We need to keep it safe and there’s no telling who or what inhabits this planet.”

“It was in my quarters,” Anakin replied, climbing through a narrow, caved-in portion of the ship. “Meet me outside. I can tell your shoulder is still bothering you.”

Then he was out of Obi-Wan’s sight, slipping further into the wreckage. Obi-Wan sighed and made his way back out to the beach. His mind was restless and his emotions unbalanced, when he needed to be sharper than ever. He sat down in the sand and started working through the facts of the situation to give himself something to focus on.

The ship was inoperable and beyond repair, that was certain. They had no way of communicating with the Council, who would probably realize something was off after they missed their arrival back to Coruscant. After a while with no response, they would send a party to come looking for them. But where would they start? They couldn’t search the whole galaxy, and Obi-Wan was inclined to agree with Anakin that they were most likely somewhere in the Outer Rim. Knocked out of Hyperspace, they could be anywhere. Maybe their distress signal could have been picked up in the short time between the start of the event and the crash landing, but they couldn’t rely on that, especially not knowing how damaged the ship’s systems already were when Obi-Wan sent the signal out. No, they couldn’t wait to be rescued. They needed to come up with a plan, before someone else found them.

Anakin stepped out of the ship, walking toward Obi-Wan with the artifact in his hand, now dangling from a silver chain. Obi-Wan raised an eyebrow.

“What? So we don’t lose it,” Anakin said, slipping it over his head like a necklace. “You’re the one so worried about protecting it.”

The object, which had first seemed to have a milky, shimmering appearance in the dark of space, now took on a slight prism effect in the bright sunlight. Anakin sat down next to him, trying and failing to shake sand out of his hair, gingerly avoiding the gash on his head.

“Next steps?” Obi-Wan prompted, then winced. He fell back into teaching mode too easily when he was on missions with Anakin. He waited for Anakin to bristle, to tell him he was his equal now, not his padawan.

“Well, we don’t know anything about this planet, so we need to explore it. See what kind of life forms exist here, and how advanced they are. If we’re lucky we’ll be able to purchase a new ship and get out of here. But first we should figure out how long the days are here. We don’t want to get lost in the forest at night. So, we should camp here for a day, wait until sunrise to get a sense of the time and the weather, and then find our ticket off this rock.” Anakin answered, no trace of anything amiss.

Obi-Wan had to try very hard to suppress his proud smile.

“Very well,” he said, carefully masking his emotions lest Anakin catch on and call him _sentimental._ “Now let me see about your head.”

Hours passed as the two scavenged what they could from the ship, bringing what little usable supplies they found to their makeshift camp. As the sun set behind the trees, the warm air turned pleasantly cool. Although the ship’s broken hull offered some protection against the elements, it was comfortable enough that they could sleep on the beach, closer to the tree line in the still sun-warmed sand. They laid out two bedrolls and stripped out of most of their layers, washing them as best they could in the surf and laying them out to dry.

Anakin walked a little ways down the beach before stripping naked and wading into the water, Obi-Wan steadfastly looking elsewhere until he was in up to his waist. He didn’t know why it still embarrassed him; he had seen every part of Anakin at one point or another, but it still gave him an unexpected thrill each time. He watched as Anakin dived under the next wave before it broke, white seafoam cresting over his head, and surfaced on the other side.

He looked away and back to the tube of bacta gel he had found in the ship. It wasn’t a lot and as much as his shoulder was aching, far too much to join Anakin in the surf, he knew he needed to conserve it. The gash on Anakin’s head wasn’t terribly deep but he knew even a small wound like that could get infected and cause much bigger problems, so that needed to be tended to first. The bruise over Anakin’s eye had deepened to some burst capillaries that looked worse than it probably felt, but that would heal itself over time.

Anakin had found a small droid replacement part that he recognized as an igniter in one of the ship’s compartments, so Obi-Wan set about putting together a small campfire. They had some rations that would last a few days, but after that they would have to scavenge their own food. He had a decent fire going by the time Anakin rejoined him, still shirtless but wearing his bottom layers again.

“Sit over here,” Obi-Wan said, gesturing in front of his bedroll with the bacta gel in hand.

“Obi-Wan,” Anakin whined, “I finally got all the sand off of me.”

“Stop your whining, or you can do this yourself,” Obi-Wan replied, feigning impatience.

Anakin acquiesced with a huff and Obi-Wan kneeled behind him, carefully parting his wet hair with his fingers, seeking out the wound. Anakin hissed when he found it, Obi-Wan shushing him and reaching for the bacta gel.

“Hold still,” Obi-Wan said quietly, unscrewing the cap as he felt a shiver pass through Anakin. “Are you cold?”

“What? No,” Anakin murmured distractedly. “Focus on what you’re doing.”

“It’s not brain surgery,” Obi-Wan chuckled, squeezing out a dollop onto his finger and dabbing it lightly over Anakin’s scalp.

Anakin tensed at the initial contact, but gradually relaxed as the gel began to mend the edges of the wound back together. Obi-Wan kept his fingers in his hair a little longer than strictly necessary, watching in fascination as the skin healed itself. He couldn’t stop himself from touching the place where his padawan braid used to sit, now evenly blended with the rest of his golden hair.

“How does it feel?” Obi-Wan asked.

“A little itchy,” Anakin admitted, looking over his shoulder and up at him with a smile. “Thanks, Obi-Wan.”

Obi-Wan thought he looked both painfully young and impossibly old in that moment. He managed to smile somewhat normally back.

“Okay, your turn,” Anakin announced, getting to his feet.

“What? Anakin, no,” Obi-Wan chided. “I told you I’m fine.”

“Bantha fodder, you’re been favoring your left arm all day. Why are you being so stubborn about this? Are you going to fight with one good arm if the Separatists attack us on this beach?” Anakin said, extending his hand for the bacta gel.

“It’s not broken, Anakin,” he replied, exasperated, reluctant to tell him the events leading up to his awakening on the beach. But Anakin, stubborn as he was, would not relent, and eventually he confessed that his shoulder had only been dislocated.

“But then, how did you…?” Anakin trailed off, putting the pieces together in his head. “Oh, Obi-Wan, that’s sick. You put your own arm back in its socket?”

Obi-Wan let out a grim laugh.

“To your credit, you did help,” he said casually.

“Am I supposed to know what that means?” Anakin asked dubiously.

Obi-Wan sighed.

“I didn’t want to hash out the details but since you’re giving me no choice,” he said, shooting Anakin a half-hearted glare. “You know the ship split in two and we crashed in separate locations. When I found you, you were unconscious and I had to revive you. During that process my shoulder slipped back into the correct position.”

Anakin stared at him incredulously for a moment.

“Are you saying you gave me CPR with a busted arm and a concussion?”

“Well, you were slightly worse for wear than I was,” Obi-Wan replied primly.

“Unbelievable,” Anakin said under his breath, but without any real heat.

“So, I’m telling you I am fine,” Obi-Wan said, emphasizing his words. “The pain is nothing I can’t handle and we need to conserve that bacta gel in case we need it later.”

He could see Anakin still wasn’t satisfied with his answer, could see his mind working even without the help of the Force. Finally, he went over to where their clothes were drying and tore a long strip of fabric off one of his own layers.

“Anakin,” Obi-Wan chided, closing his eyes and summoning the strength to deal with this boy before he drove him _insane_.

Anakin tied the two ends of the fabric in a large knot, ignoring Obi-Wan’s objections. He slipped the fabric over Obi-Wan’s head, resting the knot over his uninjured shoulder and gently lifting the elbow of his bad arm until it rested comfortably inside the makeshift sling. Once he was satisfied with the adjustments he made, Anakin stepped back and observed his handiwork.

“It’ll help support the ligaments and hold your shoulder in the right alignment to heal properly,” he explained, voice soft.

Obi-Wan felt what was left of his irritation fade away. Maybe he’d been wrong. Maybe Anakin was more eager than he thought to prove himself Obi-Wan’s equal.

“Thank you, Anakin,” Obi-Wan replied. “It does feel better like this.”

The corner of Anakin’s mouth quirked up, but he said nothing. The sun was almost completely behind the trees now, only an orange glow on the horizon, rapidly fading as the stars came out to replace it. They each retired to their individual bedrolls, just a few feet apart, to watch as the inky black of space washed over the sky. The white noise of ocean waves hitting the shore lulled Obi-Wan easily toward sleep. The last thing he remembered hearing before sleep fully took him was Anakin’s voice, softly speaking:

“Huh, satellites.”


	4. fundamentals of telecommunications

_Anakin strode down a hall of steel gray, his feet carrying him surely although he did not recognize his surroundings. He placed his palm down on a scanner and a door slid open to reveal the bridge of a large spacecraft. A few people at their stations sprang to attention when he entered the room. He said nothing and they returned to their duties, aside from a Twi’lek male who approached him with a datapad in hand._

_“My lady, the ship we are tracking has exited hyperspace,” he reported, bowing his head slightly._

_Anakin felt irritation flash through him, but when he spoke his voice was soft and even._

_“Now why would they do that,” he purred, crossing his arms across his chest. “The Jedi have not discovered our tracking beacon, have they?”_

_“I don’t think so. It appears their ship was in some sort of distress. The tracking beacon is disabled but right before it went offline the Jedi sent out a distress signal that we were able to pick up.”_

_“Coordinates?” He asked, flipping through the datapad the Twi’lek handed him._

_“Ready to go, my lady, just give the word.”_

_He handed him back the datapad, reaching out to stroke one of the Twi’lek’s head-tails._

_“It’s time to take back what’s mine,” he murmured, the darkness swirling around him in anticipation, bending easily to his will. He wrapped it around himself like a cloak until the light no longer reached him. The Twi’lek put in the command and the ship entered hyperspace._

Anakin woke with a start, hand on his lightsaber.

He was back on the beach, the pink glow of the sun just beginning to light the sky as dawn broke. He glanced over at Obi-Wan, still sleeping at his side, his normally neat hair wind-tousled with ocean spray. His hand shot up and affirmed that the relic still hung around his neck, glittery fog swirling within the crystalline sphere. Anakin took a steadying breath, reaching out to the light and sighing with relief when it still responded to him. He fell back against the bedroll.

They were being hunted, that much was clear, probably since they touched down on that ancient planet. He did not recognize the voice of the woman he had shared the vision with, but she was clearly strong with the Force and had the means to track them over long distances. They needed to get off this planet now more urgently than ever.

“Obi-Wan,” he called softly, gently nudging him awake.

Obi-Wan stirred, blinking sleep from his eyes. He had always been a light sleeper for as long as Anakin could remember.

“What’s wrong?” He asked, sensing Anakin’s anxiety.

He relayed the events of the vision to him as if he had been a bystander, leaving out the part where he had seemed to inhabit the Force-user’s body.

“You think this was the person who attacked us?” Obi-Wan asked.

Anakin shook his head. “No, she was surprised that we left hyperspace. It would’ve been impossible for her to attack us once we entered hyperspace, but this created a window of opportunity for her.”

“Was she planning to follow us all the way back to Coruscant?” Obi-Wan wondered skeptically.

“I don’t know, but whatever she was planning this was not part of it,” he answered, gesturing around them. After a beat, he added, “You believe me, right?”

“I’m more inclined to trust a Force vision of past events than uncertain future ones,” Obi-Wan agreed, stroking his beard. “But we must be cautious. The Force is fickle and these visions give only a narrow glimpse of reality.”

They ate a brief breakfast from their ration supply in companionable silence. They redressed in their outer layers, and Obi-Wan pretended not to see when Anakin extended a hand to help with his bad arm. They began packing up their makeshift camp.

“Last night, I noticed satellites orbiting in the sky," Anakin said. "Which means if I can find a way to link up with one of them we should be able to get a message to Coruscant."

"If there are satellites, why haven't we encountered any other lifeforms then?"

"Maybe they're extinct," Anakin shrugged. "Or maybe they're just afraid of us."

"Our landing _was_ very impressive," Obi-Wan said wryly.

“Primitive satellites rely on signal transmission from a ground station,” Anakin explained. “These stations use large ‘dish’ antennas with extremely sensitive receivers capable of sending high frequency bands through the ionosphere without refraction. Ideally you would place a ground station where it would have the maximum line-of-sight contact with the satellite possible. Since this planet is densely forested, constructing one at a higher altitude would increase this contact.”

Despite the planet’s oceanic geography, it was not completely flat. In fact, beyond the beach where the rest of the ship’s remains lay, the forest sloped upward to a small mountaintop. In all likelihood, the planet was entirely covered by oceans at one point in its history. Rough waves and seismic activity could have together formed the current day topography.

“Well, I’m certainly glad you were paying attention in your telecommunications studies,” Obi-Wan praised, his tone surprised.

Anakin laughed sheepishly, scratching the back of his head. Obi-Wan didn’t need to know he had been motivated so he could learn to send encrypted messages to Padmé through the Republic’s frequencies without the possibility of tracing them back to their source.

“Let’s get a move on then, before the heat of the day sets in.”

They hid what little they couldn't carry with them in the wrecked ship and headed into the forest. They walked well into the afternoon, until the air was thick with moisture and sweat dripped off their brows. There was no pleasant breeze beyond the beach, and even the shade of the trees was no relief due to the humidity. The terrain gradually steepened the further they walked inland, making the trek tougher as they went. The forest was far from quiet. Agile six-limbed creatures swung from tree to tree high above their heads while beneath their feet scuttled vibrantly colored beetles and other insects. Strange, bioluminescent fungi seemed to reach out to them with finger-like appendages as they passed, only to quickly retract at the slightest touch. Obi-Wan lamented more than once that he wished they had time to study the planet’s diverse biota.

Anakin was finding it hard to share his fascination the longer they hiked. The relic seemed to get heavier hour by hour, the chain pulling around Anakin's neck, weighing him down. He felt like he was moving through quicksand, his mind foggy, and although he could still sense the Force around them, it felt strangely just out of his reach, evasive in a way it never was to him. He was just about to suggest they stop for a rest when they suddenly stepped into a grassy clearing, about midway up the mountain.

As if he had spoken it into existence, there stood in the middle of the clearing a large parabolic antenna, covered with green vines and clearly disused in recent years. Adjacent to it stood a small concrete building, fortified to withstand bad weather but appearing equally dilapidated. There were no windows, only a heavy steel door with a keypad above the handle.

They stood at the tree line, catching their breaths. Anakin took the opportunity to pull the relic over his head and doubled over in relief when he felt the Force flood back into his body. Obi-Wan immediately took notice, looking at him with concern.

“I thought you felt distant in the Force,” he murmured, putting his hand tentatively on Anakin’s back. “I thought you were just shielding from me.”

Anakin gave a short laugh at that.

“Like I have the energy for that right now,” he sighed, straightening up. “It’s the artifact—it feels like it’s sucking the life out of me, or feeding off the Force through me.”

“Maybe that explains the strange phenomena you’ve been experiencing. The voice, the vision…” Obi-Wan trailed off, brow furrowed like he wanted to say something else.

“You mean maybe I was right?” Anakin replied dryly, holding the object at arms length, watching as the swirling clouds within took on a pale blue tinge.

“Yes,” Obi-Wan agreed apologetically, “which means we need to take turns.”

“I—what?” Anakin said, pulling the artifact back in surprise when Obi-Wan extended his hand for it. Obi-Wan just looked at him expectantly.

“Obi-Wan, no offense, but you’re not exactly at your peak right now,” he said delicately, earning a flat look from the other man.

“You’ve looked better yourself,” he responded, unphased. “It’s the smart thing to do, Anakin. You need to focus if you’re going to figure out how to send a message to the Council, and you can’t do that exhausted and cut off from the Force.”

Anakin rolled his eyes but he knew Obi-Wan was right. He had been wearing the artifact for a full day and it was taking a toll. Obi-Wan could take a shift with it for an hour or so. If the ground station was still operational it shouldn’t take him long to send a simple message and coordinates. He still didn’t relish passing this burden on to his friend. Reluctantly, he handed it over.

Obi-Wan slipped the chain over his head and Anakin was relieved when a bolt of Force lightning did not strike him down. No matter what Obi-Wan said, Anakin had a strong feeling that the vision, the voice, and the weird dreams he was having were all stemming from the dark side of the Force. Although he chose to use the light, it was not the first time he had experienced the dark calling to him, and it was not a feeling he would easily forget. Obi-Wan shone with the light, and Anakin worried how the artifact would react to him.

“I wonder what range of influence this has,” Obi-Wan said, turning it over in his hand. “I think I should give you some space to work. If I stay near, it may still reach out to you.”

“What are you going to do?”

“I think I’d like to meditate. It’s been a while and I’ll be of no use to you in this area anyway. I can keep watch and alert you of any disturbance in the Force from our pursuer. I won’t go far,” he promised.

They agreed to meet back in the clearing just before the sun touched the treetops. Anakin watched Obi-Wan’s retreating back until the forest swallowed him up again. He turned back to the ground station and forced himself to release his anxiety, focusing on getting to work.

The door was locked but Anakin made quick work of it with his lightsaber, carving a hole through the reinforced steel. He pushed into the small room, coughing until the dust finally settled in the stale air. Inside the room was a control panel with various knobs and buttons, an old, silver radio microphone attached to a small stand, an uncomfortable looking chair, and shelves of documents and leather-bound manuals lining the walls. In the center of the room a string hung down from the ceiling which, when pulled, bathed the room in yellow light. Anakin thanked the Force that electricity still flowed to this place and began to examine the controls. Despite the crack in it, the screen came to life under his fingertips. He let the Force guide his hand to a thick, dusty book on one of the shelves, opening it to the operator instructions. He verified that the satellite dish was still aiming in the correct location. As long as nothing had disturbed its orbit, the satellite it shared transmissions with would be coming into range within thirty minutes and would remain in range for an hour, more than enough time to send a message to Coruscant.

He leaned back in the chair and scrubbed a hand tiredly over his face, wincing when he forgot about his black eye. In some ways he felt worse than when he first woke up after the crash, all his muscles tight and aching without any of the adrenaline to soften the pain. He imagined that was one of the reasons Obi-Wan wanted to meditate. Anakin was never very good at it, never able to sink below a surface tranquility, but in this moment he found himself wishing he had practiced more.

He closed his eyes and tried to clear his thoughts, focusing on his breathing. After a few minutes, his mind inevitably strayed and he thought of Obi-Wan, perched on an uncomfortable rock somewhere, probably attaining nirvana while Anakin struggled to ignore the twinge in his back. The thought he'd been trying to ignore ever since they retrieved that Force-forsaken relic and set these events into motion pressed insistently to the front of his mind. That Obi-Wan knew, that he had been inside Anakin's head, and he knew exactly what he'd seen ever since he made that comment about his clenched jaw. His face burned with embarrassment.

For years, Anakin had spent a not-insignificant portion of his energy shielding specific feelings from his master. He knew the things he wanted were not things he could have, and for the most part he had made peace with it. Obi-Wan looked at him as a brother, which was saying a lot for a man who rebuked attachments in the name of the Jedi code. He knew he was asking too much to push for more. But oh, did he want more. And in his dreams, Anakin could ask for whatever he wanted and Obi-Wan would give it to him every time. It was harmless.

But now he knew, and he was steadfastly acting as if he didn't. Anakin couldn't say he was surprised. Obi-Wan pretended a lot of problems didn't exist to ensure his narrow worldview didn't become unbalanced. Anakin had tried to channel his feelings toward Padmé instead, also frowned upon by the Jedi, but less so than fucking your former master—the man who practically raised you. It was easy, and he was faking nothing—he truly did love Padmé. But Anakin knew he could be too much, too consuming, too obsessive, and it wasn't fair to Padmé to be a stand-in for something Anakin could never actually have. He could tell she was becoming frustrated with him, and they had decided to take a break days before she found out she was pregnant. Things had been left uncertain when Anakin was called away on this mission with Obi-Wan.

One thing Anakin couldn’t tolerate was not knowing where he stood with someone. He tended to split people into all good or all bad, which he knew was unhealthy and would ultimately lead only to his own disappointment when the people in his life failed to perform according to the roles he’d assigned them in his head. But Obi-Wan was different. He _was_ good, constant and unchanging, and Anakin couldn’t pretend not to know that he would probably try to put some distance between them now.

He opened his eyes with a sigh. The satellite was in range. He sent a brief message to the Council detailing their coordinates and after a few minutes received confirmation. He stepped back out into the clearing but Obi-Wan had not yet returned. He felt the Force nudge him toward the trees, through a path that led to a small overlook point. His heart sank when he saw, down on the beach next to half of their wrecked ship, a sleek, steel-gray star fighter had landed. The sun was beginning to set and there was no sign of Obi-Wan. Heart hammering against his chest, Anakin reached out with the Force and sensed nothing. He reached even further, concentrating all his strength. There was nothing.

He was alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Back to Obi-Wan’s POV next chapter, and another flashback :O


	5. know when to hold 'em

Obi-Wan didn’t need the Force to feel Anakin’s eyes on his back until he was out of sight, but the anxiety he was projecting was pronounced. Obi-Wan suppressed the urge to send calming feelings back, knowing he shouldn’t encourage the bond that continued to exist between them despite his better judgment. Anakin was capable of controlling his emotions on his own. It was unfortunate that the bond that made them so attuned in battle also made them a little too dependent on each other outside of it, but he supposed that was why they weren’t supposed to have it in the first place.

He came upon the moss-covered trunk of a fallen tree not far from the ground station inside which a family of small creatures had made a home. He gingerly lowered himself to the ground so as not to disturb them, crossing his legs under himself. He sunk easily into a shallow meditation, like sinking into a warm bed after a long day. His mind yawned with relief. In another life, where he never became a Jedi and the machinations of the cosmic universe did not concern him, Obi-Wan imagined he would still find comfort in this.

He sat there for some time, simply feeling the air he breathed in as it cooled his nasal passages and expanded his lungs, holding it within his chest for a few seconds before gradually releasing the tension in his diaphragm, letting the warmed air pass through his slightly parted lips as he breathed out. He felt the Force become more accessible to him as he focused his mind, allowing his thoughts and emotions to flow out of him without pause or concern. He felt increasingly aware of the small blades of grass tickling his shins through his trousers, of the family of creatures that were curiously peeking out of the fallen log to investigate his strange presence. He allowed his senses to expand beyond the constraints of his body, reaching out with the light as if it were an extension of himself, until he could hold the overwhelming noise of the entire forest within his hands. He trembled with the effort of it, his mind empty and full at the same time. He sat with the uncomfortable feeling until it became easier to bear and gradually the weight turned to sand, slipping through his fingers until his hands were empty again, palms turned to the sky where they rested against his legs. The noise of the forest felt far away.

An hour passed, or maybe only a minute.

It wasn’t until he heard Anakin’s frustrated voice that it occurred to him something was abnormal. The clatter of a lightsaber hilt being tossed to the floor made Obi-Wan open his eyes. His first thought was that he must be dreaming, but Obi-Wan had never fallen asleep during a meditation before.

Before him, stone tile floor stretched to meet walls adorned with various potted plants, warm light filtering in from the windowed ceiling. A young Anakin pouted before him, his saber discarded several feet away. Obi-Wan raised a hand to his face, surprised when the action did not cause his arm pain, and found his beard was gone. Despite knowing what he’d find, he moved his fingers into his hair and felt the short chunk of hair where his braid had been. The weight of the chain still pulled around his neck, which Obi-Wan thought was strange for a memory. The artifact swirled in darkened storm clouds within its sphere. Anakin did not seem to notice it, his eyes welling with frustrated tears, hands balled into small fists at his sides.

Obi-Wan remembered this day well.

“Padawan,” he found himself saying. “Why have you stopped practicing your forms?”

Anakin rubbed aggressively at his eyes, swiping the tears away even as new ones formed.

“I can’t do them,” he sniffled. “They’re too hard.”

“They are not, Anakin, you’ve done them before. I know you can do them.”

“I can’t,” Anakin insisted, a whine creeping into his voice.

“Anakin,” Obi-Wan said, voice stern. “Pick up your saber. What did I tell you?”

“My weapon is my life,” he replied, eyes downcast.

“Precisely,” Obi-Wan said. “So do not throw it away.”

He could feel the anger in Anakin the moment before it exploded out of him, the Force shuddering ominously around the small boy, enormous and uncontrolled.

“Then why did Master Qui-Gon throw his life away?” Anakin yelled, fresh tears falling on his red cheeks. “Why did you let him? He was supposed to be my teacher! Not you! It should have been YOU who died!”

This was not the first time Obi-Wan heard these words shouted at him by his student, but they stung just the same. The first time, Obi-Wan had listened in shock before spitting back: _Don’t you think I know that? Don’t you think I would gladly trade places with him if I could? Don’t you think I know I’m the reason he’s gone?_ Anakin, still a boy, had run from the room, terrified. Obi-Wan was not proud of that moment. He was a young man, suddenly alone, unable to grieve the loss of his master, and still none of that justified taking his anger out on a child.

He felt the anger now in a distant way that only time provides. His own pain was not lessened any, but his compassion for the distraught young boy lashing out at him softened his reaction. He said nothing and got to his feet. Anakin took half a step back, bringing his tightly balled fists up defensively as if he expected Obi-Wan to strike him. In a swift move, Obi-Wan enveloped him in a bear hug, wrapping his arms tightly around him as Anakin struggled with all his might to break out of the hold. After several minutes of crying and futilely throwing himself around, Anakin collapsed bonelessly in Obi-Wan’s arms, finally letting him lower them to the ground. Both of them were out of breath, panting in the quiet of the training room. Obi-Wan loosened his grip but did not let go.

“I miss him too,” he whispered.

He didn’t know how long he sat there holding Anakin, stroking his hair. Enough time passed that his breathing evened out and he fell asleep in Obi-Wan’s arms. Distantly, he remembered present-day Anakin was waiting for him to return. Whatever this place was, he knew he couldn’t stay. He gently lowered Anakin to the floor and returned to a seated meditation position.

He suspected the artifact had something to do with this experience so he opened himself to it as he slipped into meditation. He felt the Force swirling all around him so he used it, channeling it through the artifact like a conduit. He thought of the planet they were marooned on, conjuring images of its lush scenery. He imagined he could feel the warm air on his skin, hear the ocean waves crashing on the beach. As hard as he tried to focus, he felt no connection to the place, and he knew this would not work. A few feet away, he heard young Anakin sigh in his sleep.

Reluctantly, Obi-Wan turned his thoughts instead to his Anakin, waiting for him on that planet. He thought of his crooked smile paired with his blackened eye, a look Anakin had worn more than once in the time Obi-Wan had known him. He pictured his hair, his hands, pushing away the guilt that the images came so easily to his mind. He remembered how it felt to fight alongside Anakin, how invincible he felt when he had the Force guarding his front and Anakin protecting his back.

Obi-Wan knew when it worked because the air he was breathing suddenly became denser, more humid. He expected to feel a push or pull, some sensation of movement, but when he opened his eyes he was sitting in the forest again, as if nothing had changed or occurred at all. It was quiet and the sun was well behind the trees. He could still feel the pointy blades of grass sticking him in the legs, but something immediately felt off. He didn’t move, reaching out with the Force, and noticed the creatures in the log behind him were now gone. He was inching his right hand surreptitiously toward his saber when suddenly an orange glow ignited near his throat.

“Now, now, we don’t need that, do we?” a soft voice spoke over his shoulder, calling Obi-Wan’s weapon off his belt with the Force.

"I don't believe we've met," Obi-Wan said, hands raised as he craned his neck to look at his attacker.

"No, but I've been watching you for a while now," the voice responded. "Where's your friend, Jedi?"

"I haven't the faintest. It seems I've missed our appointment."

"A shame," his attacker tisked, stepping into view in front of him. "But lucky for you, you get to stay alive a while longer."

She was about Obi-Wan’s height, of medium build, wearing what appeared to be various pieces of scavenged armor, mismatched together. Across her broad shoulders sat an asymmetrical set of clone armor pauldrons. Her chest and torso were protected by what looked like hand-crafted leather armor. Her forearms and shins were covered by some kind of bone armor that wound around her limbs like vines. In her hand, she wielded some kind of plasma weapon, the blade of orange light curved similarly to a scimitar.

“To what do I owe the pleasure?” Obi-Wan replied, perfectly nonchalant, even as his attacker reached out with the Force and yanked the artifact from his neck, breaking the silver chain as she called it to her outstretched hand.

“Well, look, don’t take this the wrong way,” she said, shooting Obi-Wan an amused look. “But you weren’t the one who actually pulled this from Ma’dav, right?”

“That was Anakin,” Obi-Wan agreed, wanting to keep her talking while she felt comfortable and in control.

“I had a feeling,” she nodded, examining it while keeping her weapon pointed at Obi-Wan. “You shine a little too brightly with the light to have made it out of that place in one piece on your own.”

“Anakin shines with the light,” Obi-Wan pointed out mildly. “He is a Jedi too.”

“Mm, yeah, but,” she pulled a face, waving her weapon noncommittally, “not as brightly as you, I’ll bet. He is powerful, I’m sure. You have to have true _balance_ to succeed there, but not in the way you Jedi think of balance. I mean balance within yourself, between the light and the dark. That’s what the Cerhys people believed.”

“You sure know a lot about an extinct civilization.”

“Extinct,” she snorted, rolling her eyes at him. “You think a race of powerful Force users ever truly goes extinct? I am a direct descendent of Kahdof, high queen of the Cerhys.”

“So why not retrieve the artifact yourself?” Obi-Wan asked.

“Ma’dav is not a forgiving place… Many people who have tried have gone mad there, dying within its walls, but their souls are forever trapped,” she grimaced. “I’m sure you encountered a few of them.”

Obi-Wan could still hear that piercing wail and closed his eyes briefly. He shook his head.

“You still haven’t told me why you haven’t killed me yet,” he said. “I am disarmed and you have what you came for.”

“Not quite,” she replied quietly, inspecting the swirling clouds within the artifact, now inky black like an incandescent oil spill. “This is a conduit of powerful Cerhys magic, but there is one other. Part of a set. I need your friend to help me retrieve it, and something tells me you’d make good bait.” She smiled.

"Anakin will not help you."

"We'll see. He's quite fond of you, you know.”

"He has already sent a call for back up. More Jedi are on their way as we speak," he bluffed.

"Oh, you mean the message my crew intercepted?" Obi-Wan's heart sank a little. "You're going to need something a little more advanced than an old radio to escape my notice, Jedi."

He fell silent. She smiled, watching him flounder for his next move of the dwindling ones available to him. After a few moments, she extinguished her weapon and hooked it on to a holster on her back, abruptly joining Obi-Wan on the ground a few feet away.

“It is as you say, Jedi: I have the upper hand. But, believe it or not, I do not wish you harm—” she leaned forward, speaking with urgency now, “—if you help me. Our interests are not opposed, and we do not need to be enemies.”

Obi-Wan chuckled at that. “Oh, yes, I suppose I’ll just willingly let you have the powerful artifact we were sent to retrieve and also help you to find the other one while we’re at it? How do you think that will go over with the Council?”

“The Jedi only sent you to Ma’dav to prevent the Sith from taking it first; they have no idea how to use it any more than the Sith do. I am no Sith—think of me as a neutral party in your nonsensical war. My only allegiance lies with my ancestors, and I have no desire to see the objects of my people fall into the hands of those with such polarized views of the Force. It would be a dishonor.”

“So what would you see done with them?” Obi-Wan asked skeptically, stroking his chin.

“I would keep them safe. There are places in the galaxy neither the Sith nor the Jedi know about. I would take them where maps cannot lead. You can tell the Jedi I forced you—or you can fight me, although you appear in no condition to do so,” she said, eyeing his arm still resting in the sling Anakin had fashioned for him.

Obi-Wan was stuck. Her argument was not a bad one; however, he had absolutely no reason to trust her word. Unfortunately, it was quickly becoming his only option. If Obi-Wan could reach out to Anakin somehow without his attacker becoming aware, together, they stood a chance of defeating her. But then there was still the issue of escape. Provided she was not bluffing, she had a crew waiting out in space to take them out if necessary. Even if they managed to evade initially, the smaller shuttle she must have taken for landing would not be capable of making hyperspace jumps, so they could not run for long. They could try to send another message to Coruscant but it would simply get intercepted again. For now it seemed there was no other way out, and not for the first time Obi-Wan wished Anakin were beside him. He was always able to see the path Obi-Wan could not.

“I’ll need to convince Anakin,” he said finally. He would buy some time, let things unfold as they would until the odds were better in his favor to act. Until he could be sure he and Anakin would both be safe.

She grinned broadly, catching him off guard. “Something tells me he will not be quite as difficult to sway as you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise she gets a name next chapter!


	6. here alone is heaven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little NSFW for your hump day

Anxious thoughts raced through Anakin’s mind as he desperately willed himself to calm down. They agreed to meet here, and now the sun was setting, there was a ship on the beach, and Obi-Wan was _gone_. He fought the urge to run down to the beach with his saber lit. Would Obi-Wan want him to stay put and wait for him? It was unnatural that he could not sense Obi-Wan at all--even if he had been taken captive his Force signature wouldn't just disappear into thin air. He knew the relic had something to do with this and he kicked himself for leaving Obi-Wan alone with it against his better judgment.

Whoever landed the ship might see the wreckage and think they were both dead. How well did they hide the evidence of the campfire they made the previous night? Wouldn't they get suspicious when they found no bodies? Anakin raked a hand through his hair, pacing back and forth, torn with indecision. Long moments passed. He was just about to make the call to investigate the ship when he felt it--the warm, familiar presence of Obi-Wan's mind suddenly appeared on the peripheral of his senses. He whined in relief. _Obi-Wan!_ He sent silently, not waiting for a response before hurrying in the direction the Force nudged him toward.

_Anakin, be careful, there is another—_

Anakin burst through the bushes, saber already drawn and ignited, eyes widening at the scene before him. Obi-Wan was still seated in a meditation stance, a strange woman sitting across from him holding the relic in her hand.

"Anakin, I presume?"

"Who the hell are you?" _Why does she have the relic, Obi-Wan?_

_I believe she is the Force user from your vision. She got the jump on me while I was in meditation._

_I thought you were supposed to be keeping watch_ Anakin teased, the rush of relief that Obi-Wan was alive allaying his anxiety despite the current situation. If his attacker wanted Obi-Wan dead, he would be dead by now.

"You may call me Laied," she replied, oblivious to their silent conversation. She stood, unsheathing her weapon from behind her back, igniting the curved orange blade. "Why don't you join your friend?"

Anakin laughed, raising his saber. "Why don't you give the artifact back and then we'll talk?"

"A demonstration then, Master Jedi," Laied said to Obi-Wan, "of why no one must wield this power."

Anakin moved first, swinging his saber down in a brutal strike that Laied blocked with her weapon, sidestepping him gracefully. She was smaller but more agile, and they circled each other slowly. Anakin changed his tactic, trying a series of short, faster strikes that Laied parried easily, playing defensively.

"Attack me," Anakin growled, growing frustrated the longer this went on.

"As you wish," Laied said with a grin.

She brought the artifact to her lips and closed her eyes, speaking in low tones that Anakin couldn't make out. Tendrils of black smoke began to emanate from nothingness, swirling around her limbs, down the length of her arm where she extended her weapon toward Anakin. He swallowed nervously as the darkness enveloped them both. The smoke was suffocating, choking the Force out of the space around him until he could no longer access it. He started to panic, slashing wildly with his saber, unable to sense where the next strike was coming from. Suddenly, he was pinned in place by a strong grab of the Force, his saber wrenched from his grip. His eyes darted around, the loss of control nauseating. From over his shoulder the orange glow of Laied's weapon emerged slowly from the darkness, curved so closely against his throat he could feel the heat of it singe his skin.

"Have I made my point?" She said calmly, not waiting for an answer before the darkness retreated like she had flipped a switch, gone as fast as it had come. Anakin tried not to gasp as the Force surged back into him, not wanting to give her the satisfaction. "Now that we have settled that, do you want to fill your friend in on the details of our arrangement?"

"Arrangement?" Anakin scoffed, glancing at Obi-Wan who was carefully shielding his thoughts and emotions. "Republic forces are coming, I contacted them just—”

"The message was intercepted," Obi-Wan cut in softly. "We have no choice but to do as she says."

Anakin stared at him in disbelief. "Well we'll think of another plan, Obi-Wan, we can't help her, she's a _Sith_. You saw the dark bend to her will—”

"She is not a Sith," he interjected again, looking at him meaningfully. He recapped their conversation briefly while Laied leaned against a tree and listened, both of their sabers hooked on her belt. “This is not my first choice either, but this is the only choice we have left.” _I do believe that she does not mean us harm, at least in the short term. We could be doing far worse as far as captors go._

 _I still don’t like it_ Anakin sent back reluctantly, but Obi-Wan knew he would go along with it for now. He nodded curtly.

“Wonderful,” Laied said, clasping her hands together. “So we can be off soon—unless there’s business you two still need to attend to here?”

Anakin scowled and Obi-Wan shook his head.

“I’ll be keeping these,” she said, gesturing to their lightsabers. “No hard feelings—never mix business with pleasure.” She smiled broadly. “I trust that you understand I will know if you try anything untoward.” She tapped the artifact pointedly before slipping it into her pocket.

______

They made their way down the mountain back to Laied’s ship, the planet’s twin moons rising as night fell. The hike was much more tolerable in the cooler evening air, but their bodies still ached with the effort of controlling their descent. Back on the beach, Anakin felt Obi-Wan brush against his mind with the Force, a light reassuring touch. _We’ll get out of this, have patience._

The door to her ship hissed open, and the three clambered into the tight space. The engine shuddered to life and they were off, arcing through the sky and out into space. A much larger ship was waiting for them, its landing bay doors opening as they approached. Laied landed with practiced gentleness, one of her crew mates coming over to meet them as they exited.

"A smooth trip then, Laied?" He asked, taking her helmet from her.

"I kept her in one piece for you, Saf," she called over her shoulder with a wave as he began inspections.

She led the way into the main part of the ship, Anakin and Obi-Wan following behind. Anakin looked around as they walked, trying to commit as much of the ship’s layout to memory as possible if there came time to make a quick escape. _Whoever designs these massive ships should think about adding a color scheme that isn't gray,_ Anakin grumbled through their bond, as one winding hall led into the next identical hall. They walked a good distance before the Twi’lek from Anakin’s vision approached them from the opposite end of the hall. A look of surprise crossed his face at the sight of Anakin and Obi-Wan before he schooled his features back to a neutral expression.

“Welcome back, my lady,” he said, passing Laied a datapad. “Some updates while you were gone. Should I prepare extra accommodations?” He eyed the two Jedi behind her, his real question unspoken.

 _He thought only one of us was coming back alive,_ Anakin realized. He didn’t know whether to feel disturbed or relieved.

“Mm, no, they should be fine with one room. They’re close,” she winked at Anakin, who felt warmth flood his cheeks as he opened his mouth to argue, but she kept talking undeterred. “As fun as our escapade was, I have some work to catch up on now. Melo will show you to your room. If you’re hungry, one of the kitchen droids can prepare you something. Get some rest and I’ll send someone to wake you when we’ve arrived at our destination.” She tapped away at the datapad distractedly.

“And where is it we’re going again?” Obi-Wan asked casually, his crisp accent earning a crooked smile from Laied when she looked up.

“That is none of your concern, Master Jedi, although your charm is almost disarming. Almost. I’ll send a medical droid to see about your arm.” She turned away from them, Melo clearing his throat and gesturing down a hall to their right.

He led them a little ways to a door he opened by palm sensor, the doors hissing open to reveal a modestly decorated room with a queen size bed in the center covered in lilac-colored satin sheets, already turned down. A door off to the side led into a clean white washroom with a soaking tub. Melo inclined his head, moving to leave when he paused and seemed to reconsider, turning back to them.

“In case Laied did not make it clear,” he began, choosing his words precisely, “as of present, you are our guests. Whatever you need, you may use this comm screen to request. The rest of the ship is off limits to you. If you choose to leave this room and go snooping where you do not belong, we will know, and you will find yourselves in much less hospitable quarters.”

He bowed his head to them again and retreated into the hall, the doors hissing closed behind him.

“Well, I don’t know about you, but I love when my lodgings come with thinly veiled threats,” Anakin said dryly before flopping back onto the bed.

“Anakin, at least shower first,” Obi-Wan chided, eyeing the clean sheets.

Anakin heaved an overexaggerated sigh up at the skylight in the ceiling, the stars twinkling impassively back. He reluctantly sat up and started pulling his boots off, letting them thump to the floor inelegantly. Meanwhile, Obi-Wan examined the comm panel on the wall, flipping through the options.

“I’ll have the steak, in case you’re ordering dinner,” Anakin called as he walked barefoot into the washroom. “See if they have a nice merlot.”

“They actually don’t have a bad selection,” Obi-Wan replied, choosing the seared fish for himself. "Seems to be a dry ship though."

"For all the time we spend in unsavory places dealing with seedy people you'd think they'd at least have good alcohol," Anakin shook his head, the noise of the running water drowning out most of his words as he stripped out of his clothes.

He pulled the glove covering his cybernetic arm off last before stepping into the bath, barely concealing a groan as he sunk into the warm water. It felt indescribably good on his sore muscles, the Epsom salts he had dumped in on a whim tingling his skin pleasantly. He closed his eyes, luxuriating in the feeling. He wasn't sure how long he dozed for before he felt Obi-Wan gently reach across their bond, rousing him that food had arrived. He finished cleaning himself off quickly and stepped out of the tub into the comparatively cool air of the washroom, shivering and drawing one of the fluffy towels around himself. He glanced at his dirty clothes in a pile on the floor before stepping back into the bedroom.

"Any chance there's clean clothes in that dresser?" He asked, the smell of hot food immediately making his mouth water.

"Mm, they're your color too," Obi-Wan said, pulling out a set of dark brown colored clothes from the drawer not unlike his normal attire. He didn't look at Anakin as he turned and passed him the clothes. He had stripped his tunic off at some point, the rarely seen, well-defined muscles of his chest and arms making Anakin’s throat go dry at the sight. Anakin noticed his arm was out of the sling with a bulky cold pack now strapped to his shoulder.

"Thanks. Did the med droid come already?"

"Yes, it gave me some kind of cortisone shot for the pain and told me to ice it.”

Any witty banter Anakin could come up with immediately dried up alongside his willpower to stop admiring the gift that was Obi-Wan shirtless, so he let the conversation drop, dressing quickly before joining him at the small table. They ate in companionable silence, Anakin’s shields firmly locked down against his errant thoughts. By the end of the meal, Anakin was yawning heavily, stretching his arms behind his head to Obi-Wan’s amused smile.

“Go to bed, Anakin. I’ll wash up and join you shortly.”

“Yes, Master,” he responded automatically before he could call it back, his cheeks burning a little at the old title, both strange and normal in this circumstance. If Obi-Wan noticed, he did not let on.

He collected their plates and set them outside the door before heading into the washroom. Anakin breathed out a pained sigh and got into bed. The satin sheets felt pleasurably cool against his skin, pulling his thoughts back to the present. After a moment of indecision, he sat up and pulled his tunic over his head. It wasn’t long before the sound of running water lulled him to sleep, and for the first time in a long time he dreamt of nothing.

______

Anakin awakened slowly, awareness coming back to him in gentle waves. It was dark save for the dim light that cascaded in through the window, bathing half the room in pale monochrome. He felt a heavy weight strewn over his waist, pinning him comfortably in place on his side. He nuzzled his face into the pillow under his head, rutting a little into the blankets when he noticed he was half hard. Just as he was about to turn over and wake Padmé, see if he could get her in the mood too, he became aware of a very specific, firm pressure poking against his lower back. His heart hammered in his chest as the reality of where he was and who he was with slammed back into him.

Suddenly, Obi-Wan’s strong, warm Force signature was all he could focus on, his presence intoxicatingly close and his mind relaxed and open in the way he only felt in sleep or deep meditation. _He’s still asleep,_ Anakin tried to reassure himself, doing little to calm his racing heart. _Did I cause this somehow?_ But this had never happened before, despite his guilt for his earlier thoughts. Anakin knew he experienced the Force much more intensely than anyone else he’d met, but typically that made him more receptive to others’ thoughts and emotions, not the other way around. The idea that this was not coming from him but from Obi-Wan was hard to make sense of.

As nervous as this situation made him, Anakin was still depraved at heart, and his arousal eventually won out, coaxing him to full hardness. Here, lying in the dark with Obi-Wan pressed up against his back, Anakin could close his eyes and pretend. What could only exist in his dreams was made suddenly real, and he was desperately weak for it.

Obi-Wan was still shirtless, the heat of his chest bleeding into Anakin’s back. His face was tucked into the back of Anakin’s neck, his beard prickling the sensitive skin there, his breath coming in warm little puffs. Anakin spread his legs a little and pushed his hips back gently, so gently so as not to wake him, his breath hitching when the hard line of Obi-Wan’s cock pressed against his ass. His own cock throbbed between his legs, but Anakin could not thrust forward against the blankets while also pressing back against Obi-Wan without the movement inevitably waking him. The thought crossed his mind to use a Force suggestion on Obi-Wan to keep him asleep, but that was a little too slimy for him to seriously consider, and the unpracticed intrusion into his mind would probably wake Obi-Wan anyway. Instead, he wormed his hand under his waistband with as little movement as possible, squeezing the base of his cock firmly. Relief sung through his body and he repeated the movement from base to tip. He wanted desperately to thrust into his own hand but he forced his hips to remain still. This was going to have to be enough.

With his mind carefully shielded, Anakin let himself fantasize a world in which he could grind back against Obi-Wan as wantonly as he liked. Stirred from sleep by the hard press of his cock, Anakin would wake him with the insistent roll of his hips, begging for it without words. He wondered if Obi-Wan would still make him ask for it, teasing him in that playful voice, or if he would sense the enormity of Anakin’s desire and pity him, sliding the arm around his waist lower and wrapping a hand around his aching cock. Anakin would be mewling for it by the time Obi-Wan pressed a slick finger against his hole, fisting his hands in the sheets. Once he was spread on two of his fingers, Obi-Wan would slip into Anakin's mind, each press of his fingertips against his prostate driving him closer to the edge, but never close enough that he could actually find release. He would make Anakin wait for his cock, sensing exactly where that line was and exploiting it until his cock was leaking in Obi-Wan’s hand. Then, at long last, he would remove his fingers, gently shushing Anakin's whine with a kiss to the back of his neck before slowly pressing the thick head of his cock inside him. Anakin's neediness would turn to quiet moans of relief as Obi-Wan gave him exactly what he needed, over and over again, holding him tightly to his chest as he thrust into him. Only once Anakin was trembling through the aftershocks of his orgasm on Obi-Wan's cock would he let himself come, burying himself deep inside Anakin with a quiet gasp.

That was how Anakin came, into his own hand, exhausted with the effort of remaining undetected while Obi-Wan slept behind him. He sucked in slow, deep breaths until his heart rate slowed. Reaching out a hand, he gently pulled one of his soiled garments from the floor with the Force, catching it and wiping off the mess. He thought about nudging Obi-Wan off of him but ultimately couldn't do it. He knew when he woke again Obi-Wan would no longer be touching him, so for now he let the warm weight of his arm soothe him back to dreamless sleep.


	7. i hope you blink before i do

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter took me a while to get out, apologies for that! I work full time as a nurse in a hospital and this pandemic BS is getting a little out of hand again. But writing this story has been a great joy to me these past few months, and I just wanted to say thank you again for reading as we head toward the end. The chapter count may change a bit as I finish this but I think we’re still on pace for 10 chapters right now. Anyway, enjoy!

The droid that had been beeping insistently at the door, pulling Obi-Wan out of his meditation that morning, played a short holovideo of Melo informing them the ship would be landing shortly. He thanked the droid and let the doors slide shut, turning back to Anakin who was flat on his back in the center of the bed, limbs spread and taking up a large portion of the space. Obi-Wan smiled fondly as he let out a soft snore, willing to let him sleep a few minutes longer.

He had woken early, pressed close to Anakin's back, his arm wrapped loosely around his waist, unsure how long they'd been like that. He had returned from his bath the previous night to find Anakin already asleep, curled up on one side of the bed. Exhausted, he had tucked in beside him, dutifully facing away as they did when they had shared a bed in the past. He knew Anakin was a heavy sleeper and tended to move around a lot in his sleep, so it would be no surprise for Obi-Wan to wake up with Anakin pushing into his space, leaving him stranded on the edge of the bed, all the blankets pulled to his side. They had never woken up quite like this though.

Obi-Wan had carefully extricated himself, rolling gingerly away when he realized his cock was straining against his trousers. _Well, this hasn't happened in a while,_ he thought, shoving away the implication of _why_ it was happening now. He set his feet on the cool floor and pushed himself out of bed, Anakin rolling into the vacated warm space almost immediately in his sleep.

He had better use of his arm now, he noted, as he pulled his tunic on with less difficulty than before. He left the cold pack, now warm, on the small table. He lowered himself to the floor and sunk into meditation, his erection fading as he emptied his mind. Feeling stronger than yesterday, he flexed his connection with the Force, expanding his awareness to the rest of the ship. There was no one directly around them, only Anakin's strong, familiar Force presence sleeping peacefully. He extended his awareness further outward, sensing several beings in the hangar bay. In the opposite direction, there were several beings in close proximity to each other, which he assumed was most likely the bridge. There was only one presence that stood out in the Force that he knew to be Laied, roiling with both the dark and the light, never quite blending right, like oil and water—immiscible. A belt of strange, negative energy seemed to orbit around her, quivering and volatile, unlike anything Obi-Wan had sensed before.

The beeping at the door had brought him back to the bedroom before he could linger too long.

He sat down gently on the bed next to Anakin, taking in his sleeping form. His chest was bare, rising and falling with his slow breaths. Obi-Wan reached out and touched the leather wound tight around his right forearm, wrapping his fingers around Anakin's gloved mechno wrist and holding the weight of it in his hand. He could still feel it, Obi-Wan knew, just differently from the rest of his body. He called his name softly across their bond, Anakin’s eyelashes fluttering before he opened his eyes. The sleep-softened look on his bruised face made Obi-Wan’s heart clench even as he smiled tenderly back. Contentment radiated from Anakin, deliciously peaceful in a way Obi-Wan rarely felt him. He stretched his left arm over his head in a dramatic stretch, groaning awake, but let his right arm remain anchored by Obi-Wan to the bed. Then, all at once he seemed to remember where they were, his eyes snapping open, and his shields came slamming down so abruptly Obi-Wan felt like he’d been shoved as Anakin’s end of the bond closed off.

He frowned, pulling his hand back. “Are you okay?”

Anakin wouldn’t meet his eyes, shifting guiltily away as he scrubbed a hand through his hair. “Uh, yeah, just had a bad dream is all.”

It was a reasonable enough lie that Obi-Wan didn’t believe for one second. It was as if Anakin forgot it was Obi-Wan who was there through a good portion of his nightmares throughout his life. He was used to many emotions from his former padawan during those moments—fear, anger, guilt. There was certainly never the happiness that had flowed from him just moments ago. Disappointed, he said nothing. This was not the time or place to have this conversation—something Anakin probably knew well.

“We’re landing,” Obi-Wan said, tone business-like. “I’m sure someone will be around soon to collect us.”

Anakin nodded bitterly. “I still don’t like that we’re just going along with this. We shouldn’t trust Laied to honor her word once this is done. That’s _if_ whatever planet she’s taking us to doesn’t kill me before I can retrieve the second artifact.”

Obi-Wan made a face. “I will not let that happen, you know that,” he said, as if it were that simple.

“Might not have a choice. We barely made it out of Ma’dav. For all we know this place could require a blood sacrifice—maybe that’s why Laied didn’t want to do it herself.”

“We have no reason to distrust her yet,” Obi-Wan reasoned, “and we are in no position to act right now. If the situation changes, we’ll adapt.”

“Sure thing, Negotiator,” Anakin said under his breath, pulling his tunic and boots on.

Something occurred to Obi-Wan that he hadn’t told Anakin yet.

“Anakin, when I was alone with Laied... She told me that the reason you were able to pull the artifact from Ma’dav was because you are more balanced in the Force.”

Anakin snorted, shooting Obi-Wan an amused look. “And you still believe this crazy woman?”

“More balanced,” he continued, seriously, “implying you have some of the dark within you. That you are not entirely of the light.”

Anakin swallowed, his smile falling. His shields were still pulled high up around his mind, leaving Obi-Wan to read only his body language.

“I asked you, back on that awful planet, what it meant,” he said finally, tone unnerved but not exactly surprised by this revelation. “Why only I could hear that voice, telling me what to do.”

Obi-Wan nodded, remembering his answer. “I wasn’t sure then, but it makes sense.”

Anakin’s breathing picked up, his eyes looking anywhere but at Obi-Wan. He wrapped his arms tightly around himself, looking lost and alone.

“Hey,” Obi-Wan said softly, as if Anakin were a skittish animal he was trying not to startle. His eyes flitted to meet his own. “I can’t help you if you shut me out. There is still light in you, Anakin, an incredible amount. Don't let your fear feed the darkness.”

“How?” Anakin whispered, eyes wide.

A sharp knock at the door made them both jump. Obi-Wan sighed and got to his feet, opening the door to find Laied standing there, her brow quirked. “Why do I have the feeling I’ve interrupted something?”

“Nothing of importance,” Obi-Wan said easily, falling back into his usual controlled demeanor. Anakin, on the other hand, still looked shaken, and he worried if telling him was the right decision.

"Right. Well, if you'll follow me we can be off."

As she turned back out into the hall, the light caught on their lightsabers, still hanging on her belt.

"Give us our weapons back," Anakin demanded, snapping back to himself. "If this place is as dangerous as you say I'm not going unarmed."

Laied scoffed. "Are you a soldier or a Jedi? You are not unarmed, you have the _Force_ ," she mocked with a smirk. "Besides, your weapons will not help you here. This planet is uninhabited by anything that could be struck down by such a thing."

"I see you're still bringing yours," Obi-Wan commented dryly.

"Old habits," she smiled. “Well, you know.”

They reached the hangar bay and clambered back into Laied's fighter. As the doors slowly opened, a massive dark planet appeared in front of them. Marbled with streaks of white, it was beautiful as well as imposing. Before they took off, she passed each of them a simple respirator, similar to the one Master Plo wore.

“Long ago, this planet had a high amount of volcanic activity,” she explained, slipping hers over her head and tightening the straps around her face. “They are all long since dormant, but the air is still toxic with ash and poisonous gases.” Her voice took on a muffled but still discernible quality.

They made their way toward the inky planet, only the eerie sound of their respirators disturbing the awed silence. As they approached landing, the ship started to kick up large amounts of ash from the planet’s surface, obscuring their view from the cockpit. All they could see was a swirling storm of grey in front of the ship’s lights before Laied switched into auto-pilot for the landing. The ship touched down, and after a few minutes the dust settled, slowly revealing a massive stone tower in the middle distance. They were quiet for a moment as the engines powered down, none of them moving as they stared ahead at the daunting structure.

“We seem to be a good distance from Ma’dav. What significance did this planet hold to the Cerhys?” Obi-Wan asked, breaking the silence.

“Rituals were held here. My people believed this place was immensely powerful, that was why it was also very dangerous. Through the Force, they believed they could harness the energy created by the volcanoes and use it to control anything—even the weather. The reason most of the galaxy believes the Cerhys extinct is because, long ago, a drought wiped out the entirety of our crops. Nothing grew on Ma’dav; rivers dried up. Many of my people died in the ensuing famine. A chosen few were sent here to find a solution, to find a way to bring rain back to Ma’dav. They never returned. It’s unknown for sure whether they died here or eventually recognized the futility of the situation and gave up, making a life elsewhere. But I am here,” Laied smiled ruefully, “and so I must assume the latter.”

“I’m sorry,” Obi-Wan said, and found he meant it. Even Anakin seemed a little sympathetic.

“Thank you. It was not the will of the Force,” she said simply. “I have been a wanderer for so long it’s hard to imagine having a place to call home. I guess my ship is that for me now.”

“You aren’t tempted?” Anakin spoke suddenly. “To use the relics to make yourself more powerful? You could restore Ma’dav—maybe find others like you who survived.”

Laied shook her head. “No, although I have thought about it. I’ve had nothing but time to think about it. The Cerhys sealed these items away for a reason, and my only goal is to honor their legacy by not allowing them to become tools of a war the Cerhys have no stake in.”

They exited the ship, their boots sinking several inches into the settled ash as they stepped out. Obi-Wan grabbed reflexively on to Anakin’s shoulder as his balance slipped and felt Anakin’s arm come up around his back in return. He recovered quickly, turning to thank him, but Anakin had already drawn his arm back, moving away from him in a way that felt very intentional. Obi-Wan pushed the sting of it away and focused on following the path Laied was carving out toward the tower.

The landscape was dark and desolate. Almost no light reached them, and yet Obi-Wan could feel heat emanating from the surface of the planet, warmed by underground lava currents. They trod through it as if it were heavy snowfall, slowing their progress. As they approached the tower, he could see that it was starting to sink into the unstable ground, listing just slightly to the right. The large doors were partially buried in ash and debris.

"Give me a hand?" Obi-Wan asked Anakin, putting his hands out in front of him. Anakin nodded and mirrored his motions, both of them sending a strong push of the Force at the heavy doors, knocking them slightly ajar.

Laied slipped in through the opening, jumping down a few feet to the main floor of the tower, now partially sunken below ground. One by one, they dropped down behind her, noticing the air was much warmer inside.

The tower consisted of a large, open room, circular in shape, with what appeared to be a stone altar at the center. As they walked, the sound of their footfalls echoed off the high ceiling, too far away to make out in the darkness. On the wall opposite the entrance stood two massive stone statues, both holding weapons similar to the one Laied wielded, crossed in an X shape between them. They stared straight ahead, helmets guarding their expressions. On either side of the path to the center of the room ran narrow channels of molten lava, coalescing into a moat surrounding the platform that held the altar.

Laied stopped in front of it, pulling the artifact from her pocket, although it was almost unrecognizable now. It shone an angry red, no longer swirling lazily within its confines, but violently churning, almost vibrating in the palm of her hand. The energy of the tower grew more disturbing by the minute. She motioned for Anakin to step up to the altar. He opened his mouth to argue again but Obi-Wan sent a sharp pulse through their bond, drawing his attention. Anakin's eyes obediently slid over to meet Obi-Wan's instead.

 _I am with you,_ he thought fiercely, _I will protect you._

Anakin swallowed hard, his expression pained, but with a curt nod he steeled his face. Stepping over the lava to the platform, he stood alone at the altar.

Laied brought the artifact to the mouthpiece of her respirator and began speaking fervently in a language Obi-Wan had never heard before. Her eyes were closed, the artifact clasped so tightly in her fist he worried it would break. As she spoke, the energy of the room changed. Suddenly, the platform Anakin stood on lurched to life, spinning slowly as it rose out of the floor, sending him scrabbling for purchase on the sides of the altar. He ripped his hands away, stumbling back a step, when the carved-out basin in the center of the altar began to fill with molten lava, seemingly from nowhere. The platform stopped its ascent several meters off the ground, grinding to a halt. A deafening quiet fell upon the room, broken only by Laied’s soft panting as she caught her breath.

“The sibling has been revealed,” she called from beside Obi-Wan, voice strained. “You must retrieve it, Anakin.”

Anakin looked at the burning lava in front of him. “You can’t be serious,” he called back down with dawning horror as he realized what she intended him to do.

“What is it, Anakin?” Obi-Wan asked urgently, unable to see from the floor of the tower.

“She wants me to stick my hand in a pool of lava!” Anakin growled back.

“Can you use the Force?” Obi-Wan suggested, hopeful. He felt the Force pulse as Anakin tried to raise the object from the lava, but after several seconds he stumbled back, shaking his head with a grunt.

“There’s nothing there,” he called back.

“I assure you, there is,” Laied bit out, still holding tight to the artifact. “I can feel its presence. Open yourself to the Force and you will feel it too, but you must open to the dark as well as the light.”

Obi-Wan could distantly feel Anakin’s anxiety swell, heady and nauseating. He probed Anakin’s shielded mind gently, _let me in?_ Silence followed, leaving Obi-Wan hanging for several long moments until he was sure Anakin would refuse him. Then, as if a dam had broken, he tipped forward into Anakin’s mind, closing his eyes against the tide of turbulent emotions that washed over him immediately. Below that, he sensed a current of strength and power unlike anything he’d ever felt before.

 _You can access the dark side,_ Obi-Wan realized, _you’ve done it before._ He felt Anakin nod in assent, shame burning all around the edges of his mind, only expanding his access to the dark energy spanning all around them in the tower. Obi-Wan already felt drunk with power despite being in Anakin’s head only a few minutes. He was quite sure this was the path to madness.

Obi-Wan steadied himself as best he could, using every grounding technique he had ever learned to focus his mind on the light. He needed to act as Anakin’s anchor to the light, to ensure he did not fall to the dark side in the face of such concentrated power. He was not sure he would be strong enough, but that hardly mattered now, with Anakin hanging to the light by only a thread.

 _Anakin, we must do this together,_ he thought, ignoring the tantalizing dark pull of Anakin’s mind, beckoning him closer, deeper. _Remember who you are; remember me. Can you feel the light within me?_

 _Yes,_ Anakin sent back, the single word dripping with so much desire it nearly sent Obi-Wan to his knees. He shook the pleasurable feeling off aggressively; this was the dark trying to manipulate him, nothing else.

_Let the dark guide you to the object and then no farther. Come back to the light—come back to me._

He watched from below as Anakin began to pull the glove covering his cybernetic arm off. He kept his eyes firmly closed, letting it drop at his feet. His face was screwed up in concentration as he reached out with his cybernetic hand, hovering above the surface of the lava. Obi-Wan watched, transfixed, clinging to the light with all his will as the dark bombarded him within Anakin’s mind, but unable to look away as Anakin slowly plunged his hand into the basin. He waited for the gruesome sight of melted metal, twisted and warped by the extreme heat, or the smell of burnt wiring as Anakin pulled his hand back. But it never came. When Anakin opened his eyes, his hand was impossibly intact. Obi-Wan watched as Anakin opened his fist, staring at the concealed object for a long moment. Beside him, he heard Laied draw in a sharp breath.

 _Anakin?_ He tried.

Anakin didn’t respond. He had a distant look in his eyes that was making Obi-Wan more nervous by the second. He watched as Anakin raised his other hand, holding something close to his body that Obi-Wan still could not see.

_Anakin, come back to me._

Panic was rising into his throat. A thought that had been repeating in Anakin’s mind became louder, more insistent. It was the last thing Obi-Wan felt before he was shoved violently from Anakin’s mind.

**_Get out of my head._ **


	8. feelin' good was good enough for me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you can see, no-write November went extremely well for me. Here's a longer chapter in apology <3

Anakin stood frozen in front of the altar. Obi-Wan probed gently at his shields.

_Let me in?_

Anakin wanted to refuse. He wanted to turn tail and get as far away from this planet as kriffing possible. Ever since they landed, the Force had been practically screaming at him that this was wrong. Laied was hiding something and Obi-Wan was too blind to see it. The dark was so strong here and it called to Anakin, persistent but not yet impossible to ignore. Obi-Wan undoubtedly sensed it as well.

_Let me in?_

More than anything, Anakin wanted to accept. The night on the ship before they retrieved the first relic had been an awful tease. It felt so long ago despite only being a matter of days and since then, he had struggled to put it out of his mind. He imagined he could still feel traces of where Obi-Wan had been in his mind, fingerprints left behind. After the initial embarrassment faded to a tolerable level, a strange twist of jealousy quickly flared to life its place. These moments only ever happened on Obi-Wan’s terms; he seemed perfectly content to never let Anakin know they happened at all. But now, here he was freely offering, and how could he refuse?

It felt weak to give in so easily despite the rational part of his mind hating every part of this plan. Even still, he wanted. He wanted Obi-Wan inside his mind the way he used to be every night when he slept, soothing away the nightmares and the tension he carried with him. He wanted him pressed into every corner of his mind until he could feel nothing but Obi-Wan, strong and familiar. He believed so strongly in Anakin’s inherent goodness that it was difficult to let him down, even though he knew what Obi-Wan would see if he let him in. But he needed to trust him, and for that, Obi-Wan needed to know him.

Feeling wild and vulnerable, Anakin made the snap decision and leapt, all at once dropping his shields.

At first, it was a pleasurable rush exactly as he remembered it. It reminded him of flying; the sharp nosedive when the bottom dropped out from the pit of his stomach, and then—Obi-Wan was all around him, all gentle worry and bright, searing light. The intensity of it began to feel a little like a hot iron was being held close to his mind, a strange sensation that a distant part of Anakin realized was unusual. He ignored it and tried not to resist the intrusion.

Instead of relief, things became harder to focus on after that. In the face of Obi-Wan's light, the dark seemed to double down, digging into Anakin's consciousness painfully the harder he tried to ignore it. The Force felt heady and out of control, and he strained to focus on Obi-Wan’s voice.

Balance. He needed to let just enough of the dark in but not so much that he could not control it.

He tentatively tried to open himself to his emotions the way he had on Tatooine, the day the Tuskens killed his mother. The first time he had used the dark side of the Force. The unbridled rage wasn't there though, not like it had been that day, and as horrible as her death still made him feel, Anakin couldn't conjure his anger the same way anymore. Frustrated, he knew he needed to change tactics. He did the most un-Jedi-like thing he could think of and started systematically identifying the emotions he was feeling, letting them come to the surface for inspection.

He was tired and sore. His head pounded. He was pissed that none of the other Jedi had found them yet. He was irritated that Obi-Wan had gotten them roped into this circus of Laied's in the first place. He was bitter that she had the upper hand. He was annoyed that Obi-Wan acted so predictably cocksure despite his plan being half-baked and short-sighted. Strongest of all, Anakin felt the sharp sting of jealousy. He was jealous Obi-Wan got to play around in Anakin's head when he wanted but he couldn't speak the truth aloud to his face that, on some level, they both knew; that Obi-Wan wanted him, that Anakin wanted him back. That they had to keep dancing around each other from here to eternity because of some bullshit rules someone who had never gotten laid came up with.

He wanted to be free of the constraints of the Order. Despite everything, he still really wanted to win the War. Deep down, he wanted to do it with Obi-Wan. He wanted to do _everything_ with Obi-Wan. Here, in this place, those things didn’t seem so far out of reach. In fact, there seemed to be only a thin veil separating what he wanted from what he was allowed to have, and the wanting was growing stronger within him the more he indulged it.

And that was something he could use.

By the time he heard Obi-Wan asking him if he could _feel his light,_ Anakin felt incredible. The Force thrummed through his veins, a concentrated and exhilarating high. He struggled to stay focused and in control, to let just enough of the dark in to complete his task. It felt impossible when such a tiny gap in his resolve opened the floodgates to pleasure, power, and things that Anakin desired more than anything else in the galaxy. The part that was driving him the most out of control was that he could feel Obi-Wan responding to it too. Good, stoic Obi-Wan wanted to play in the dark with Anakin too. He could feel the desire in him even as he pushed it away, cloaking himself tightly in the thinness of the light. It made Anakin want him even more.

An unusual impulse cut through the haze of his mind, drawing Anakin’s attention immediately as it did not seem to originate from Obi-Wan or himself. A shadow—flitting out from the living, breathing darkness, but when Anakin tried to turn his attention to it, it vanished as quickly as it had appeared. As on Ma’dav, Anakin was suddenly, inexplicably filled with the knowledge of what he needed to do to retrieve the object. Distantly, he was aware Obi-Wan was speaking to him but he could no longer hear the words.

As Anakin removed his glove and extended his mech hand over the basin, the fear that had once sat in his throat disappeared, taken lovingly away by the dark that encompassed him. He let it in a little more and all at once he plunged his hand into the shallow pool of lava. His fingers closed around a small, round object at the bottom of the basin. He pulled his hand back and opened his eyes.

In the palm of his undamaged hand sat an ivory ring, unremarkable in every way. Anakin stared at it for a long moment, the Force quivering around him as he waited for something to happen—a piercing shriek, a stab of pain, something.

Nothing happened.

Gradually, the urge to put the ring on pressed insistently to the forefront of his mind. It developed so organically he might have believed it was his own had it not come with the same strange, foreign impulse as before. He turned the ring over in his hand, the impulse growing stronger as the seconds passed, crawling beneath his skin.

_Anakin?_

Obi-Wan’s worried voice floated through to him, sounding muffled and very far away.

_Obi-Wan!_

He needed to get back to Obi-Wan. He’d done his part of the deal and now it was time for Laied to make good on hers. They could finally go home and put this mess behind them. Anakin could tell Obi-Wan how he felt about him and he wouldn’t let him dodge the obvious anymore. He would _make_ him listen, and how could he not reciprocate? They were made for each other; surely Obi-Wan could see that. They didn’t need to follow the Order’s restrictive laws anymore. They could be together, and they’d be more powerful than any of the Jedi that would try to stop them. They could actually win the War. They could do whatever they wanted with the rest of their lives.

A cruel bite of laughter that was not his own cut across Anakin’s mind, leaving him frozen in place. He had heard the voice before, unmistakable in its haunting quality.

**_Oh, Anakin, you poor child. Your journey these past few days has been so hard to watch._ **

The icy fear that Anakin had been shielded from slammed back into him now as the otherworldly voice spoke inside his head. The heavy darkness that had felt so comforting just a moment ago now slid itself across his shoulders and down his back, cold and slick, and _wrong._

 **_You knew the whole time that this was a bad idea and still you allowed yourself to be used as a pawn for someone else’s gain. You put your trust in a man who doesn’t even return the feelings you hold for him_ ** — **_and they are immense. Even when your every instinct was telling you to run, you followed his command. He uses you, Anakin: manipulates you when it benefits him and disregards you when it doesn’t. Do you honestly believe that your master would forsake the cause he has dedicated his life to just because you tell him you love him? He thinks you are a naive child, unable to guide your own path without his hand at your back, and you allow him to do so._ **

The voice chuckled again, sending a chill down Anakin's spine. He could no longer feel Obi-Wan in his mind, and when he looked up he realized he could see nothing but inky blackness surrounding him.

**_Don’t worry, he can’t hear me just yet; I’ve sent him away. But he will. Because I want better for you, Anakin. The power you felt before is nothing compared to what I can show you. The things you want are attainable but only if you divert from your current path. They call you the Chosen One, but chosen for what? To fight their wars for them? From a slave boy on Tatooine to a slave to the Jedi Order… No, you are meant for so much more, Anakin. They will never give this truth willingly to you; you must take it, along with everything else you want._ **

Anakin watched in horror as his hands moved of their own accord, shaking and clumsy, as the ivory passed over the skin of his ring finger and slid perfectly into place. An ancient power unlike anything he had ever felt consumed him, burning with an intensity that tore at the seams of his mind and body, threatening to explode. He was struck with the gut-wrenching feeling that every cell in his body was being stretched and compressed simultaneously as space was made for something new, and Anakin was suddenly, terrifyingly aware he was not alone in his body anymore.

**_Forgive me, Anakin, I hope you survive. I really have grown quite fond of you._ **

The last thing he saw before the entity seized full control was Obi-Wan standing down below, his face contorted on a shout, blue eyes wild with fear.

______

“Anakin!”

Obi-Wan felt the moment Anakin’s mind went quiet like the stab of a knife, the connection between their minds severed without warning. He staggered back, his gaze snapping up to Anakin where he stood upon the raised pillar. His eyes were open but unseeing, gripped by fear in a way that Obi-Wan had never seen him, even in the midst of battle. The Force trembled and the ground beneath them followed suit.

“What’s happening to him?” He shouted at Laied, disturbed to find an equally distressed look on her face.

“He’s out of balance,” she called back, shaking her head. “He’s gone too far into the dark—you have to bring him back to the light.”

Obi-Wan reached toward Anakin with all the strength he could muster but each time he tried to pass through the heavy curtain of darkness that fell between them, he was repelled. Anakin’s Force presence had been dampened by something wholly unnatural.

“He’s shut me out, I can’t—something else has taken control of him!”

A tremor shook the earth again, more intense this time, as unsettled ash cascaded down on them from above.

Laied began chanting rapidly in another language again, more forceful now, the relic held tightly in front of her. The Force was a dull roar in Obi-Wan’s ears, his heart hammering in his chest.

Suddenly, Laied's voice cut out mid-syllable, the room falling eerily quiet. Obi-Wan whipped his head around to find her hands at her throat, eyes open wide, staring upward. He followed her gaze to Anakin, who floated gracefully down from the pillar, an unreadable expression on his face, his hand extended toward her in a fist.

"I'll take that," he murmured, pulling the relic from her grasp with the Force.

He released Laied, who crumpled to the ground gasping.

"Anakin—!"

"Not here at the moment," he said slowly, drifting to a stop in front of them.

The voice was Anakin's, but Obi-Wan got the distinct impression that the one using it was unpracticed, the words spoken in the deliberate way one would speak a second language. He had removed both his gloves, the gold of his mech hand immediately drawing Obi-Wan's attention as he was usually loath to let others see it. On his flesh hand sat a ring of bone white.

Obi-Wan made a move toward Laied but she quickly put up a hand to stop him. He turned back toward Anakin's form, where he stood examining the relic intently

"Who are you?" Obi-Wan demanded. "What have you done with Anakin?"

The thing controlling Anakin took a long moment to respond, humming in thought as he turned the relic over in his hand.

"You should address me with more respect, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Anakin’s fate is entirely in my hands," he responded tonelessly, turning his gaze on Obi-Wan. "And you already know my name. After all, you've become fast friends with my _sopen,_ my only family."

Obi-Wan stared back, trying to see beyond the face of the man he trusted implicitly with his life. A memory of a conversation floated to the surface of his mind unbidden, and with it a name.

“Kahdof,” he said with sudden certainty, “You were queen of the Cerhys people.”

“Was, and will be again,” she replied, the words droning out. “Thanks to your wayward padawan.”

She floated the relic into the air next to her and moved on to examining Anakin’s body, holding his hands out in front of her and flexing his fingers experimentally. Obi-Wan’s stomach turned.

“I have waited several lifetimes to join the living again. It is so strange to have a physical form once more. I can’t say I expected it would be the Chosen One, but the Force has favored me today. He is truly _powerful.”_

The ground beneath their feet trembled once more as she commanded the Force, more ash cascading down from above.

“How are you here?” Laied wheezed, trying to right herself. “I looked for my family for so long, I—I thought I was alone.”

“You know nothing, Child,” Kahdof said, turning away. “Just because you failed to find others like you does not mean they do not exist. Our blood persists in the galaxy; I can feel it. Just as I can feel the lonely emptiness within you. You want to know the reason you were abandoned—why you spent your whole life alone?” She turned back toward Laied, not waiting for an answer. “Your parents knew what you would grow to be, how powerful you would become. How like me you truly are. So they sent you away, just like our ancestors did to me, but they didn’t have the strength to do what needed to be done. To seal you away in a tomb would be to condemn you to a fate worse than death. A fate I have long suffered, until now.”

“But why?” Laied asked, her voice cracking. Her usually self-assured demeanor was rapidly slipping away. “People were sent here to find a solution to the drought—to save us! Why would they lock their queen away? Why would they doom an entire planet to starve?”

“What else dooms man? Ignorance, fear… I was part of the group that was sent here. It took months of failure after failure, but finally I found a solution. And when I brought it to the others they did not want to see the truth. The Force is immensely strong here, but too volatile to control without a damper. I discovered a way to channel it into a usable form," Kahdof motioned to the relic, which began a slow orbit around her. "I found a way to save our planet. But the others did not like my methods. They said I went too far into the dark, that in doing so I fell out of balance. That I was unfit to rule. I did what needed to be done… and because I would not hand it over and allow the others to destroy our only chance at survival, they sealed me away here.” She held the hand bearing the ring up ruefully. “Your parents saw that same darkness in you and in their blind fear condemned their only daughter to a life spent in exile. You could not find them because they did not want to be found.”

Laied stared off wordlessly, devastation clear on her face.

“Let Anakin go,” Obi-Wan growled. “The galaxy has no place for you any longer. I won’t let you steal Anakin’s.”

Kahdof chuckled, rounding on Obi-Wan now.

“Forgive me. It’s just amusing to hear you speak in such lofty terms about Anakin’s _place._ I wonder, if I were to ask you: what do you think is Anakin’s greatest desire? Be realistic—none of that Jedi nonsense. We’ve both been in his mind long enough to know better than that.”

“I’m not playing games with you,” he gritted out. He desperately needed a plan, but he was so out of his depth. He needed Laied’s help if they were going to save Anakin. Unfortunately, he needed to keep Kahdof talking for now.

“Oh, come on,” she said, the playful tone in Anakin’s voice all the more painful in this circumstance. “It’s more fun if you guess.”

Obi-Wan pushed his frustration away. There was no point in lying to someone who could rifle through Anakin’s mind at will.

“I suppose, Padmé? He thinks I don’t know about their relationship but… I know he cares for her deeply.” It felt beyond strange to be saying this to Anakin’s face, whether he could hear him or not.

Kahdof nodded solemnly. “You are not entirely blind, I’ll give you that. But no, there is something he desires more. Would it help you to know that he used it to access the dark side? Oh, the yearning and shame of it nearly sent him over the edge. Too bad I was just a little quicker on the draw.” She grinned.

_Obi-Wan?_

He nearly gave them away at the startle of the sudden voice in his mind: Laied’s voice, straining with effort. Obi-Wan drew his shields a little tighter around his mind before chancing a response.

_Laied? How are you doing this?_

_I’m not sure exactly. It’s something about this place, but it’s taking all my energy to do. Something spoke to me, and suddenly I knew how to communicate with you like this._

_But we have no bond, it doesn’t make any sense—_

They both reached the same conclusion at the same time.

_Anakin._

_He’s still with us,_ Obi-Wan could’ve cried with relief.

 _I know you have no reason to trust me,_ Laied thought urgently, _but I have not broken my word to you yet. I did not know the truth of this place—if we’re going to save Anakin, we need to get rid of Kahdof._

 _Okay,_ Obi-Wan agreed, _but how?_

_It’s better you don’t know or Kahdof will be suspicious. Just act natural and follow my lead—and whatever happens, Obi-Wan, get back to my ship._

Obi-Wan felt the absence of Laied as quickly as she’d come.

“Oh, come on. Not even a guess?”

He had no time to linger on her words with Kahdof leering at him, waiting for a response. He set his jaw and looked back at her defiantly. He knew exactly what she was getting at. He was no fool, or stranger to attachment, no matter what facade he showed to others. He knew Anakin was flawed, knew it better than most. He wouldn't let her exploit Anakin’s affection and passion, all the things that made him extraordinary and beautiful, just to punish Obi-Wan—to make him out to be cold-hearted. If Anakin was really here listening, Obi-Wan would not let him hear those lies even for a moment.

“Well, given what you’ve said, I’d imagine it had something to do with Anakin’s crush on me,” he said, as if they were discussing the weather. The surprised look that crossed Kahdof’s— _Anakin’s_ face at the confession would have undone him if he had not readied himself for it. He continued on in a casual tone. “I’ll admit I’ve turned a blind eye to it for a while now, longer than I would expect a crush to last, but I cannot pretend I do not care for him in return. Why do you think I’ve said nothing of his relationship with Padmé? I know the enormity of his emotions; I don’t begrudge him for having them. We are more alike than he knows…”

The hiss of a weapon igniting broke the spell that had fallen over the room. He hadn’t noticed Laied had gotten to her feet until she knelt in front of Kahdof, her curved saber held out in offering.

“Your highness,” she breathed, head bowed in supplication. “I’ll admit I had only the faintest idea of the power the ring contained when I arrived here. Forgive me for my ignorance, I have lived so long under a false pretense of who the Cerhys were. Will you accept me as your subject—I pledge myself not to the traitorous Cerhys, but to you, my rightful queen?”

Obi-Wan’s eyes widened. Kahdof was silent for a long moment.

“You would betray your companions?”

“They are no friends of mine—they are my prisoners. Why do you think they are unarmed? I captured them and brought them here aboard my ship to aid me in raising the ring. They were merely waiting for the right moment to attack me and flee. Look into the mind of the one you inhabit and see I am right.”

Kahdof closed her eyes briefly. Whatever she saw in Anakin’s memories must have satisfied her. When she opened them again she raised a hand, placing it on Laied's bowed head.

"What makes you think I need you, Child?"

"You don't," Laied said softly. "But imagine the look on my parents' faces when, after all this time, they see us walk in together, master and apprentice. Imagine their faces when they realize they managed to cause the very thing they abandoned me to prevent."

"Mm, now that is compelling,” Kahdof murmured. “But I do not believe that you no longer hold any lingering fondness for them, and I have no use for servants who do not respect me. When the time comes, will you stop short as they did, or will you do what needs to be done?”

“Look inside my mind,” Laied said, raising her eyes to meet hers. “See the truth of my words: they are not my family.”

A beat of silence passed, and the Force was still.

“To invite me in is to invite the darkness, to tip the scales and disrupt the balance of your mind.”

Laied nodded. “Balance has never served me.”

Kahdof caught the artifact from the air, where darkness swirled in an endless void within its sphere. She brought it close to her chest with the hand bearing the ring, the contrasting white and black standing out starkly against Anakin’s skin. She spoke in the same language Laied had, chanting words echoing off the high ceiling. As she spoke, thick tendrils of darkness began to wind down the length of Anakin's arm, reaching over to Laied until both of them were cloaked in inky blackness. The Force, already unstable in this place, now churned viciously. Even shrouded in the light, Obi-Wan could feel the violent power washing over the two of them.

He waited helplessly, watching the scene unfold, when suddenly a subtle movement of Laied’s hand caught his eye. Her cloak pulled back just enough to reveal Anakin’s and Obi-Wan’s lightsabers resting on her hip, she made a hand motion he would recognize anywhere. A battle signal, one that he and Anakin had used countless times to communicate wordlessly with the clones. _Forward, advance._

Obi-Wan didn’t hesitate to pull both sabers from her belt with the Force, catching one in each hand and igniting them, adopting a Jar’Kai stance. He had only practiced it occasionally in training with Ahsoka, but it would look suspicious to leave one of the weapons with Laied who had just convinced Kahdof that they were not aligned. In a flurry of motion, Obi-Wan jumped into the air, bringing both blades together in a brutal strike down on Kahdof that she just barely blocked, wrenching Laied’s weapon from her outstretched hands and swinging it up overhead. They stared at each other for a long moment across the crackling static of their crossed blades, Anakin’s handsome features contorted in rage—no recognition in his eyes.

“You will die for that, Jedi.”

“Let Anakin go,” Obi-Wan growled.

They disconnected, trading blows as they danced around the room, narrowly avoiding the streams of lava that flowed through the cracked stone floor. They were pretty evenly matched, with Kahdof seeming to draw on aspects of Anakin’s skill as well as her own. After long minutes, Obi-Wan saw an opening in her defenses, and with it a harrowing opportunity. His last blow had knocked her off balance, and she swung her left arm out to correct it. The ivory ring seemed to cut through the darkness in slow motion. He could swing the blade of his other saber down now and cast Kahdof out of Anakin, saving him, but doing so would sever Anakin's other hand. Obi-Wan couldn't move, couldn't even breathe as the moment dragged on. The lava burned orange and blistering around them as time stood still.

Suddenly, an image coalesced in Obi-Wan’s mind, and with it an insidious feeling of déjà vu. He stood above Anakin, pleading with him, as Anakin, roiling with the dark, screamed his hatred at him. He watched in horror as one by one he cut through Anakin’s limbs, the smell of burning flesh thick and nauseating. Obi-Wan couldn't tell where Anakin's pain ended and his own began, each echoing through the Force back at him.

It was no memory—a premonition, or maybe a warning? The Force was impassively silent.

Kahdof took another strike at him, Obi-Wan barely putting his sabers up in time to block it. The moment had passed, Anakin's wild eyes still glared at him from across the glow of their crossed blades. Obi-Wan’s strength was wearing thin, the exhaustion of the past few days weighing heavily on him, while the power and the darkness within Kahdof grew stronger by the minute. The words Kahdof had spoken in Anakin’s voice repeated in his head. _Will you stop short, or will you do what needs to be done?_ Blow after blow, Obi-Wan blocked, not even getting his saber up to return a strike before another one came down on him.

He could not strike down Anakin, and he could not fight forever. The realization washed over him with a strange sense of calm. Between losing his own life and losing Anakin, there was no choice to be made. As Kahdof raised her weapon high above her head, Obi-Wan’s arms dropped and he did not raise them again. He closed his eyes and let his awareness shift into the Force as he knew Qui-Gon had tried to do all those years ago. The burn of the blade when it made contact felt like a distant sting against his skin, and Obi-Wan thought _yes, I’ve done it right._

When he opened his eyes he was no longer in the stone tower. He was back at the temple in one of the training rooms. Midday sun filtered in through the windows, breathing life into the lush, green plants that lined the room in clay pots. The faint smell of lavender and lemon balm soothed his senses. Anakin stood before him wearing his padawan robes, saber ignited, looking about sixteen years old by Obi-Wan’s estimate. He was beaming with surprise but an undercurrent of nervousness radiated from him in the Force. Obi-Wan’s hand not holding his own weapon moved to his side where his fingers found a small hole singed in his clothes, a superficial burn on the skin above his hip.

“I actually got you,” Anakin breathed, clearly trying to temper his excitement and failing.

Obi-Wan smiled fondly at him, blinking at the tears that came unexpectedly to his eyes. The small tinge of pain was nothing compared to the overwhelming emotion that welled up inside of him, that frightened him to give name to. “I’m so proud of you, Anakin,” he said finally, his voice barely above a whisper.

Distantly, he could hear a muffled voice, far away as though he were being held underwater, but he ignored it, trying to keep his mind empty and focused on this moment in the Force with Anakin. Whether it was real or not couldn't have mattered less to Obi-Wan in that moment.

Anakin’s eyes widened in surprise for a second before a lopsided smile crossed his face. He raised his saber and dropped into a fighting stance again, Obi-Wan following suit.

A strange pulling sensation Obi-Wan could feel deep in his core began to seize hold of him, as if some invisible force had latched around his middle and was dragging him back. _Please, no, let me stay here—let me stay with Anakin,_ he thought. _Let me have just this one thing._

"Bet you I can do it again," Anakin grinned, seemingly oblivious to Obi-Wan's struggle.

The pain in his side was not easing, Obi-Wan noted with a trace of panic. If anything, it seemed to burn hotter, drawing Obi-Wan's attention to it and away from this place. As his focus wavered, the image of Anakin smiling in front of him rippled like a drop of rain falling into a still pond.

_Master, stay with me._

"I'm trying," Obi-Wan whispered desperately, struggling with dwindling strength against the riptide pulling him out to sea. "Anakin, I'm trying, but I can't—it's too strong—"

The temple faded away, the plants, the smells, even Anakin, replaced by murky darkness, thick and suffocating. _This isn't right,_ Obi-Wan thought in anguish, _this isn't how it's supposed to be._

 _Obi-Wan, it's okay,_ Anakin’s voice cut through the deafening fog, strained but commanding.

 _He's still here, he hasn't gone yet,_ Obi-Wan thought wildly, hope tearing at his mind. _I still have a chance._

_Come back to me, Obi-Wan, please—open your eyes!_

With the last of his strength, Obi-Wan forced his eyes open. The full force of the searing pain in his side slammed into him, almost immediately causing him to lose consciousness again. The last thing, the only thing, he remembered seeing was Anakin's face hovering above his own, wracked with horrible, palpable guilt. Then, everything went black.


	9. no string of fate

The soft but maddening sound of a door squeaking on its hinges roused Obi-Wan from a deep sleep. At first, he tried to ignore it; the pull of sleep dragging his exhausted mind back enticingly, and for a few blessed moments the noise ceased entirely. He was no sooner dozing again when the noise started back up with renewed vigor. Obi-Wan swore under his breath, or at least he tried to, the words sticking in his dry, scratchy throat and coming out as barely a hoarse whisper. Anakin must have left the door open again; he’d told him  _ repeatedly _ that the room was drafty and could he  _ please _ demonstrate some common courtesy and  _ close the door _ when he left for—

But Anakin was not a child, and this was not the Temple.

His eyes snapped open, blinking blearily until his surroundings coalesced in front of him.

He was lying on his back in what appeared to be a small hut, the branches of some kind of palm plant expertly interwoven to form a dome-shaped thatched roof overhead. The tight-knit patterns seemed capable of keeping out oppressive sunlight as well as heavy rainfall. What a curious combination of weather concerns, Obi-Wan thought, and what a beautifully evolved species of plant to survive in such a specific climate.

Gradually, he became aware of something pressing along his side, and with it a twinge of discomfort. It was a dull ache, but the stiffness in his bones warned him that if he were to move it would become sharp, and so he remained still.

The air was warm and dry. As he turned his head to the side, a comfortable breeze caressed his face as if it were directing his gaze. The room was darkened, although some sunlight still seeped through the tiny cracks in the walls and ceiling. Next to him, Anakin was slumped in an uncomfortable-looking chair, arms crossed and brow creased, head cocked to one side as the muscle along the side of his jaw worked vigorously.  _ Of course, _ Obi-Wan thought.  _ Well, I suppose he has been through quite a lot these past few… days? Force, how long has it been? _

He shifted his eyes to find Laied sitting in another chair at the foot of the bed watching him. With her armor removed she appeared smaller than he remembered. Even her face seemed softer, her expression placid. She gazed at him steadily and for a while neither of them said anything.

The door to the hut opened suddenly, ushering in a flood of bright sunlight, momentarily blinding Obi-Wan as he brought a hand up to shield his eyes. He squinted at the silhouette of a small figure who paused in the doorway before coming to Obi-Wan's side. The door to the hut snapped shut, startling Anakin from his sleep.

"Obi-Wan, you're awake," he said, scrambling to Obi-Wan's side only to be pushed back into his chair by the small scaly being that had entered. He threw up his arms with an affronted glare, pulling a small smile from Obi-Wan.

The being wordlessly shined a light into each of Obi-Wan's eyes, emanating from a thin bioluminescent appendage on her head, until she seemed satisfied and moved on to examining his side. Obi-Wan tried again to speak, but his throat still felt raw and painful.

The being paused in her ministrations to pull a flask from her bag. She wordlessly urged Obi-Wan to sit up while she held the flask to his lips. The change in position had him grunting in pain, but the relief of the cold water hitting his throat quickly pacified him. He had never felt so parched in his life. After draining the entire flask, she pulled a clear vial filled with blue liquid from her bag and uncorked it, moving to press it to Obi-Wan's lips.

"What is that?" He rasped. The being said nothing, simply holding the vial out and gesturing to Obi-Wan's torso.

"They don't talk," Laied said. "At least, not to us, but they’ve been helping you. It's medicine for your side. You were… wounded." She trailed off uncertainly, glancing at Anakin who was leaning forward in his seat, watching him closely.

"Wounded? How…?" Obi-Wan trailed off, struggling through the fog of his mind to remember something, anything, before it all went black. The being raised the vial to his mouth again with gentle insistence. This time he accepted. If she wanted to poison him, he supposed, it made little sense to have revived him in the first place. The blue liquid was slightly viscous but not entirely unpleasant. He turned his attention to Anakin. “Where are we? How long have I been out?”

“Uh, about a week. As for where we are—I’m not sure exactly. Somewhere in the Outer Rim,” Anakin exhaled, finally relaxing into his chair a bit. “Laied wouldn’t tell me.”

“I said I couldn’t tell you,” Laied cut in with an annoyed glare that Anakin returned. She continued in a softer tone to Obi-Wan. “I told you there were places in the galaxy the Republic didn’t know about. I’ve been here before. The only reason I know of its existence is because it revealed itself to me, when I was injured and in need. This was years ago. I’ve tried finding it since with no success. It doesn’t follow any standard planetary orbit, and the most advanced radar systems cannot detect it. It’s as if it simply vanishes once you leave its atmosphere.”

“That’s impossible,” Obi-Wan said.

“Quite,” she agreed. “I never thought I would find myself here again.”

The being, which had been loosening the adhesive on Obi-Wan’s side as they spoke, began pulling the bandages off, causing a fresh wave of pain to wash over him. He let out a quiet, involuntary gasp, Anakin coming to his side immediately. He loosened Obi-Wan’s clenched fist and took his hand in his own, giving it an encouraging squeeze.

_ Is this who we are now? Is this what we do? _ Obi-Wan thought wildly as she poked and prodded at his wound.

“How does it look?” He asked through gritted teeth.

“Painful,” Anakin admitted, still with that strange tone of guilt and regret. “But better than it did. You really don’t remember anything?”

Of course he did. He remembered the smell of fresh herbs. He remembered sunlight. He remembered Anakin’s smile. He just wasn’t sure if any of it was real.

“I remember we fought. You were… possessed by Kahdof. She pushed me from your mind. I couldn’t…” he swallowed. The memory of the ring, of Anakin’s arm moving in slow motion. The choice he’d made. “How am I still here?” Something in his voice sounded fragile even to his own ears.

Anakin averted his eyes but kept his hand clasped tight. When he finally spoke, his tone was even and measured.

"When Kahdof… took control, I retained some awareness through the Force. I don't think she realized. Remember what she said about the relic being created as a damper for the Force? I thought that was odd. I think her idea was inherently flawed, she just couldn't see why. She thought she was putting brakes on a speeder when in reality she was putting reins on an untamed animal. Well, a damper can be opened, so that's what I did. I cranked the Force up to eleven," he grinned, sounding more himself.

“How reckless,” Obi-Wan said with a quirked brow, unable to summon his usual tone of disapproval.

“I thought you’d say that,” Anakin replied airily.

“How was that supposed to help us? Wouldn’t that just have made Kahdof stronger?”

“I had a hunch Kahdof didn’t understand that place as well as she thought she did. The Force was powerful there, I know you could feel that. Well, for me it was like a freight train passing under a starfighter going supersonic. Loud and kriffin' distracting.”

“Because of your midi-chlorians?”

“I guess,” Anakin shrugged. “It was better for her to think she had the upper hand. While she was talking, you drew her attention away from the relic so I used it to communicate with Laied. It was like there were invisible strings connecting us to each other that I could suddenly see, like communication channels. That's the best way I can describe it."

“That’s how you were able to talk to me without a bond,” Obi-Wan said to Laied. “You borrowed mine and Anakin’s.”

Laied nodded, wincing. “I have no idea how you two live like that.”

“That’s also how she knew what signal to give you to attack,” Anakin continued. “Nice touch with the Jar’Kai, Ahsoka would’ve been proud.”

“I don’t know, Kahdof kept me on my toes pretty handily.”

“It was enough to get her away from the relic so I could use it,” Laied said. “I apologize for not clueing you in fully on the plan, but Anakin and I weren’t sure how secure our communication was, and I couldn’t risk her finding out. It was better for you to look believably shaken, but I recognize that can’t have been easy for you.” She inclined her head.

“I understand,” Obi-Wan said with a tight smile.

“This is where things get a little messy,” she said, looking to Anakin.

To their surprise, that was when Obi-Wan’s nurse wrapped up his dressing change, a clean, white bandage in place along his side. He had almost entirely forgotten she was there, the pain dulled, and Anakin’s warm, calloused hand still wrapped around his own. As she straightened up to leave, taking her bag with her wordlessly, it felt as though a spell was broken leaving sudden uncertainty in her wake. Anakin cleared his throat awkwardly before pulling his hand back and retreating to his chair. Obi-Wan wondered why he hadn’t thought to pull his own back sooner.

“Right,” Laied began when Anakin remained oblivious to her expectant look. “So, the relics were linked, that much we knew, but the extent to which one could control another we weren’t sure. So while you and Kahdof were dueling, Anakin and I were trying to figure out how to remove Kahdof from Anakin’s body without harming Anakin in the process.”

“We knew we likely only had one shot,” Anakin agreed. “We were losing ground fast and we didn’t have time to think, to come up with the best plan, so when I saw her… ready to, to kill you,” he swallowed, “I didn’t think, I just reacted, I jumped back inside and  _ took  _ control.” His voice wavered almost imperceptibly with the memory of it.

Obi-Wan remembered it clearly, the image of Kahdof, of  _ Anakin, _ weapon raised, ready to deliver the killing blow. He closed his eyes just as he had in that moment, the anticipation fading until there was only the Force.

“I tried to pull the swing back, but it was too late, and when I made contact you didn’t even scream. It was like you weren’t even there anymore, but that was impossible… Where did you go, Obi-Wan?” Anakin said softly, his voice startling Obi-Wan to open his eyes again and look at him. He was struck by how alone Anakin looked, how lost. His blue eyes searched Obi-Wan’s imploringly and Obi-Wan found he could not speak. The only answer he could give made no sense. The memory of the two of them practicing in the training room of the Temple.  _ I was with you, Anakin. I never left you. _

The silence stretched. Anakin's mental shields were a fortress as they gazed at each other, and Obi-Wan received no response, unconvinced Anakin had even heard the thought.

Finally, Laied spoke.

“Anakin, I think we should let Obi-Wan rest—“

“Don’t worry, I’m leaving,” Anakin said abruptly, getting to his feet as he swiped angrily at the corners of his eyes. The door to the hut fell shut behind him, leaving Obi-Wan and Laied alone. She let out a weary sigh.

“I don’t think he’s really slept since we got here,” she said. “That was the first time I’d seen him sleeping when you woke up.”

“He does get rather cranky when he’s tired,” Obi-Wan responded absently, eyes still on the hut door.

Laied leaned forward, elbows on her knees, but did not rise from her chair. She chewed her lip, looking lost in thought.

“What happened to the relics?”

She looked up, surprised. “Oh, destroyed. I guess we didn’t get to our grand escape, huh? Well, after Anakin took back control, Kahdof was still inside of him. We thought you… well, I thought the worst. Anakin was barely keeping control, thrashing around… the Force was so unstable and the tower started to collapse. We started sinking further into the ground, lava was beginning to fill the room. Finally, Anakin was able to get the ring off, and I sealed Kahdof away again with the relic,” she had a faraway look in her eyes. “It was gruesome, like Anakin was being torn in two. Then all of the sudden, she was gone. We grabbed you, and bolted back to my ship.”

“Do you think she’s actually gone for good?”

“I don’t know,” Laied admitted. “I hope so. The whole planet was ash and lava by the time we made it back into space. I don’t think anyone will come poking around anytime soon.”

Obi-Wan nodded and a beat passed.

“I need to send a message to the Jedi Council.”

“Anakin already has.”

Obi-Wan raised his eyebrows. “You allowed him?”

“Don’t give me that look. I just asked that he kindly not mention me. I am sorry for involving you two in all this. I was clearly out of my depth.”

“Why not just take us back to Coruscant then?”

“Honestly? I didn’t think you would survive the trip. You were too sick for my medical droids to handle. Anakin and I were arguing over what to do when we got pulled into orbit by this planet, seemingly out of nowhere. The natives took you in and I’ve been staying on the ship. Anakin goes off on his own every night—doesn't tell me where he goes. The rest of the time he spends here with you.” There was an unspoken question on her lips. He had a feeling he knew what it was, and he couldn’t even pretend to know how to answer it.

“I think I could do with some more rest,” he said, forcing out a yawn. It wasn’t totally a lie. He couldn’t believe how exhausted he still felt after being unconscious for days.

“Of course,” Laied said, graciously not pushing the issue. “I’ll bring some food next time. Rest up, Obi-Wan.”

His nurse didn’t return that evening. The sun set and Obi-Wan drifted into a fitful sleep. He dreamed of scaly creatures with strange appendages, of ocean waves lapping at the metal hull of a ship, of sickly yellow eyes following him in the darkness.

———

Anakin strode angrily from the hut and didn’t look back. He knew no one would follow him.

He wished he had something to pull apart and put back together, even the simplest machinery would do, but he wasn’t going to ask Laied for it. Every tree, rock, and blade of grass he passed was infuriatingly perfect. He stomped through the idyllic scenery, tracing the path he'd worn into the ground over the past week while Obi-Wan lay unconscious.

Part of him knew he was being irrational. Obi-Wan was awake. He should be elated. Knowing this didn’t soothe his anger any. If anything, knowing Obi-Wan was going to be okay gave him license to feel the betrayal he had been suppressing for days. His lack of response had confirmed what Anakin already suspected.

The trees gave way to a clearing, a small pond nestled in the middle bordered by smooth stones. He plopped down next to them, his legs folding gracefully beneath him despite his agitation, hands landing upturned on his knees. A deep line creased his forehead as he tried to clear his mind. Before he could reach a semblance of serenity, the creeping restlessness that had plagued him for the past week began to crawl beneath his skin again. Desperate to stave it off, he shifted his awareness to just outside of his body.

The stillness of the pond. The crickets stirring in the tall grass as the sun began to set. The shadows cast from the trees elongating with the late hour. There, the darkness… Stretching, expanding. It reached out with long fingers toward Anakin, curling around his wrists, passing over his neck. The hiss of mechanical ventilation startled him as he tried to take a steadying breath, but no air filled his lungs. Heart racing, he tried again, ash burning his eyes and throat. He clawed at the faulty respirator strapped to his face, trying to pry it off to no avail. The stone walls were closing in on him, the fiery heat stealing the oxygen out of the air. The tower was collapsing. He could feel his control slipping, someone else pressing along his nerve endings, paralyzing him.

Suddenly, the heat dissipated. From the darkness, a mirror materialized before him. He recognized the empty bowl sitting on the table below it. Cold dread filled him as he felt himself take a step forward against his will. He couldn’t yet see his reflection clearly in the dust-covered mirror, but as he drew closer he noticed a large crack now ran diagonally through it. With each step he took, his shadowy reflection grew larger until he was standing just in front of the mirror. He watched as his shaking hand reached out toward it, placing his palm flat against the mirror, and in one swift motion, he swiped the dust away.

With a gasp, Anakin’s eyes snapped open. He was in the clearing. Heaving in gulps of air, he crawled the short distance to the pond, plunging his hands into the clear water in his haste. He leaned over the surface of the water until it finally stilled again and his reflection looked back at him. Unremarkable, if sleep-deprived. He hung his head, taking deep breaths until his heart stopped hammering in his chest.

He was losing it. He couldn't meditate. He could hardly sleep. He was anxious and irritable. The worst part was that he knew exactly what would make him feel better, and now he finally knew in explicit terms that he would never have it again. Not only was Obi-Wan aware of his feelings, he had dismissed them as  _ a crush,  _ even after Anakin had felt the desire in him when their minds were joined.

_ That was the influence of the dark side,  _ the reasonable part of him whispered,  _ it clings to me even now. _

But Obi-Wan had seen everything. Every moment of weakness, every shameful part of Anakin laid bare for inspection. The parts that Anakin knew belonged to the dark. And now Obi-Wan knew too. Kahdof had been right about one thing. Obi-Wan would never—could never—look at Anakin again the way he once did. All the careful work he had done to conceal those feelings over the years had been a joke. Obi-Wan had decided death was preferable, had  _ chosen _ it, and it was only Anakin's inability to let go that kept him here now.

Anakin sighed, leaning back on his heels. He stared impassively at the last of the setting sun, feeling exhausted and defeated.

He was in love with Obi-Wan. 

He had no idea what he was going to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There will probably be two more chapters after this since Obi-Wan and Anakin are committed to misunderstanding each other. Next chapter they should get some clarity and maybe even a kiss? We'll see!


End file.
